“Birthday Banquet?”
For the past three days, rewriting the introduction to her thesis had left Song Tianyang so dizzy and exhausted that she completely forgot her own birthday.
Her family wasn’t well-off, but every year on her birthday, she could eat a fruit cake her mother brought home.
If they lived in a studio without a fridge, the cake would be smaller, to avoid leftovers spoiling overnight.
After moving into the dorm for college, Song Tianyang, having shared a quarter of Miss Xu’s birthday cake, finally realized the human tongue really could tell the difference between animal cream and vegetable shortening. The cheap fruit cake’s vegetable cream just wouldn’t melt in her mouth, and after eating, her mouth felt like it was coated in wax. So, in her first year of college, she used her part-time earnings to buy her mother a birthday cake made with real animal cream.
“You reminded me, I need to go find my grandpa.”
“I’ll go with you,” said Chi Zhiqing.
Song Tianyang replied, “This is a family matter. Who brings a minister along to deal with household affairs? But you can come with me to the Birthday Banquet when the time comes.”
Chi Zhiqing frowned, but thought it was better to stay in the shadows than out in the open.
His Majesty had just arrived at the He Family, and her investigative report was still a blank sheet. The He Family and their social circle’s underestimation of her was, in a way, a form of protection. So he said, “Alright, I’ll wait for you near the He Family. If anything happens, call me. When you’re with your family, pay attention to the details. If you don’t understand something, write it down and ask me later. If they ask about our relationship, just say I’m your friend.”
“Mm—”
Chi Zhiqing waited quietly for her reply.
The young Emperor thought for a long time and said:
“You already are my friend.”
“Of course,” he chuckled, “Your Majesty, I have something I want you to ask He Mingyi, in your words—remember this—”
It took Song Tianyang another two days before she saw her grandfather, who flew back on a private jet.
The old man had asked ahead of time what she wanted to eat. She couldn’t name a favorite cuisine, so she just answered hotpot—when she and her roommates dined out, they usually had barbecue, hotpot, or grilled fish to improve their meals. Stir-fried dishes weren’t much different from the canteen or takeout.
She thought He Mingyi would take her out to eat, but they ended up back at the He Family Old Residence.
In the spacious dining room, one side featured fresh, mild Huaiyang cuisine, and the other had a bubbling little hotpot.
Ignoring the pot of Wuyi Da Hong Pao on the table, which gave off waves of fragrant orchid aroma, Song Tianyang asked the chef serving the dishes beside her, “Do you have Coca-Cola?”
“…Yes, Young Lady.”
In less than two minutes, chilled Coke was served in a glass.
The main dish was fish maw and vegetable rice soup, with a golden egg nestled atop emerald-green baby greens.
Once the pot boiled, the chef first poured her a bowl of soup to drink plain—matsutake mushroom broth with red dates, sweet and clear. When the Zhizhi Shrimp King, skewered on a stick, was placed in the pot, its tail gradually turned from blue to red.
Song Tianyang noticed that, besides the upgraded quality of the ingredients, every dish was something she loved.
These days, she was already used to having no privacy in front of the He Family.
“Grandpa, have you investigated my food preferences?”
Song Tianyang asked.
This was the first question Chi Zhiqing had told her to ask.
He Mingyi was taken aback, but nodded frankly, “You don’t have to be afraid. I just want you to be comfortable when you come home. If you have to say it yourself to get it, that means their service isn’t up to par,” he paused, “But carbonated drinks are bad for your teeth, so it’s best to drink less.”
Everything in the He Family, from daily life to meals, was tailored to personal preference.
He thought his granddaughter would quickly get used to this lifestyle.
“I’m not afraid. It’s not the first time I’ve been investigated by illegal means.”
Song Tianyang answered calmly.
The last time she’d had her account checked was while playing Peacekeeper Elite.
“But,” she pretended to think, actually recalling Chi Zhiqing’s coaching, “If Grandpa wants to know about me in the future, just ask me directly. If you learn about me through others, you’ll only see me through their eyes.”
As soon as she finished, the Emperor System refreshed a new triggerable mission—
[Fired Eldest, Crown the Youngest (0/1)]
[Shen’er is not like me, is Tianyang like me?]
[Note: This mission is a long-term goal. Any action that increases completion will be rewarded. Please actively seize the throne, Your Majesty!]
—In the Chronicles of the Grand Historian, it was recorded that the brilliant Emperor Wu of Han disliked Crown Prince Liu Ju for being “benevolent, forgiving, gentle, and cautious; the Emperor disliked his lack of talent and that he was not like himself.” He disliked that his son wasn’t like him, but later also praised the Crown Prince’s sincerity and quiet nature, saying he would surely bring peace to the realm.
An emperor’s words are sometimes like toilet paper.
Too inconsistent, even for wiping one’s ass.
Song Tianyang felt a ripple in her heart.
The He Family’s eldest legitimate grandson was, of course, her biological brother.
From what the System revealed, Grandpa disliked her brother for not being like him?
She continued:
“But I’ve decided that no matter how much I like a dish, I won’t take more than three bites from it in the future.”
He Mingyi leaned forward, “Why?”
“I’m afraid someone will poison me.”
Song Tianyang sounded disappointed, “I thought with a family as big as ours, there would be food tasters before every meal.”
He Mingyi, having seen countless people, found himself unsure about what kind of person his granddaughter was.
Her earlier words were so proper, they moved him a bit.
But then…
The Emperor System praised her: [Your Majesty is acting more and more like a suspicious emperor. Excellent!]
Song Tianyang was secretly delighted.
“You should be careful about food safety outside, but you can relax at home,” He Mingyi said, half amused, half helpless.
They chatted about family at the table for a while. Song Tianyang didn’t understand business, so He Mingyi picked out some trivial matters to share. Occasionally, when mentioning the three family members at home, he couldn’t help but sigh, “I’m not making excuses for your parents. They’re both muddle-headed. If you don’t want to be close with them, keep your distance. Just maintain appearances. Your brother…”
The old man tilted his head and smiled, “If you can’t handle him, come to me.”
When He Jianshen came up, the old man’s attitude was noticeably ambiguous.
With both grandchildren outstanding, he wouldn’t intervene too much, but he also wouldn’t stand by and watch his grandson actually harm his granddaughter.
But if Song Tianyang really came to him for help, it would mean she was even more useless than useless.
“As for the matter of changing your surname,”
He Mingyi took a sip of tea and spoke gently, “I’ll offer a number your adoptive mother and her mother can’t refuse, so they’ll both change their surnames to He. By then, you’ll be the only one still surnamed Song.”
“…Huh?”
The older the ginger, the spicier. Song Tianyang had met her match.
“I’m joking. If you’re not used to it, just change it back legally. What you call yourself in daily life is up to you. Miss Song has taken great care of you. The money I give her isn’t a name-change fee, it’s to thank her for raising you all these years.”
Unlike He Madam’s arrogance and disdain, He Mingyi spoke of Song Tianyang’s adoptive mother with special respect, and handled everything beautifully.
In his eyes, Song Huafeng had done her utmost, raising her daughter well.
He Mingyi saw his granddaughter show a dumbfounded look for the first time, and instead burst out laughing, “You think I’m a bad guy, don’t you?”
“No, old man.”
As soon as she said it, Song Tianyang quickly covered, “An old man at home is a treasure. Grandpa, you’ll be my guiding light in life from now on.”
He Mingyi chuckled, “You don’t want to marry that boy from the Gu Family?”
“He doesn’t want to marry me either.”
“His wishes don’t matter,” when talking about outsiders, He Mingyi was even more dismissive, “You can fight with me to the end if you disagree, but he wouldn’t dare. Just wait and see—by the time your Birthday Banquet comes around, his mindset will probably have changed, and he’ll accept reality.”
Grandpa liked people with a rebellious spirit.
Song Tianyang caught a hint of it and said nothing.
“Gu Shangyang is good-looking, and his character isn’t bad. Don’t think he’s weak—having a weaker partner isn’t a bad thing. You youngsters can get along first. If after two or three years you really don’t like him, then break off the engagement. Grandpa won’t stop you then.”
“But if I have a fiancé, I can’t date anyone else.”
He Mingyi was even more puzzled than she was, “As long as you don’t get pregnant or make a big scene, you can date. That boy from the Gu Family won’t turn against you over something like this.”
“But my future boyfriend will mind! He doesn’t want to be a homewrecker!”
—Song Tianyang had no dating experience, had never liked anyone, and had no romantic fantasies.
To her, romantic freedom was like air.
She wouldn’t get addicted, but she had to have it.
He Mingyi was truly shocked this time, “You’re so rich now, how could anyone not agree to be your side guy?”
“…”
Song Tianyang didn’t know what to say.
She really couldn’t get on the same page with this rich old man.
His values were so off!
“Is it that guy you got a hotel room with who’s not okay with it?” He Mingyi frowned, “Tianyang, remember, we’re different from other families. You can date freely, but don’t let a man lead you by the nose. Be especially cautious with marriage, since it involves the division of assets… Forget it, you’re inexperienced in matters between men and women, I shouldn’t blame you too much.”
Song Tianyang was displeased by this.
How was having proper values and morals considered inexperienced?
She was inexperienced in matters between men and women?
Ha, what a joke!
If you opened her bookshelf on DODO and Yueji Novel Website, and her works on BO3, you’d see how knowledgeable she was—scholarly beyond measure! The saying “well-read and learned” was practically made for her. All the books she read were “vehicles”! Luxury vehicles! Multiplayer vehicles! Dual-gender vehicles! (To the censors: my female lead is researching Lamborghini. Lamborghini, as a sports car, can seat both men and women, so it’s a dual-gender car.)
While Song Tianyang was righteously indignant, she heard He Mingyi say, “I’ll arrange for two young, clean-cut men to be your secretaries. With good-looking people around you, at least you won’t be swept off your feet by just any Tom, Dick, or Harry.”
His own son was the best negative example.
A fool married a petty woman, and polluted the family gene pool.
“?”
Song Tianyang was baffled, deeply shocked.
Emperor System:
[Congratulations, Your Majesty, for simultaneously triggering Achievements: Study Companion Page Boy and Bedroom Palace Maid. Reward: Imperial Authority +50]
[A gift from an elder cannot be refused. Your Majesty, try to truly win them over as your own people!]
“What’s wrong?”
He Mingyi looked over kindly.
“No, nothing. Then, Grandpa, please broaden my horizons.”
Song Tianyang bowed her head and dug into the hotpot.
No idea how many times she’d reached into the pot, she ate until she lost all sense of the world.
This time, when Song Tianyang left the He Family, she didn’t see any other family members.
The He Family was so big, even if she wanted a palace drama, she couldn’t find anyone.
The estate was bigger than the Imperial Garden—how could you have a “chance” encounter?
She walked a long way before she found Chi Zhiqing waiting for her in a coffee shop on a snack street.
He was sitting by the window, with a half-finished iced Americano in front of him.
Through the window, she could see his flawless, handsome face. She’d already noticed three groups of people walk past the coffee shop three times, just to get another look at Chi Zhiqing.
Seeing him again after leaving the He Family, Song Tianyang finally felt a bit grounded.
She wanted to call out to him from afar.
Calling his full name felt too distant, just the last two characters felt too intimate.
Blame his name for sounding like a romance drama male lead.
“My dear minister!”
Song Tianyang hopped over.
“Your Majesty, I’m here.”
The moment he looked up, that chestnut-brown head was already right in front of him.
Anyone else hearing their titles would think it was ridiculous, but Song Tianyang only found it fun. She lowered her voice to report, “I asked what you told me to. I didn’t expect Grandpa really did check my background! I already suspected him a bit after the Swiss Roll Incident. This time… wait, no, hold on…”
As she fell silent, her expression changed several times.
The posts she’d made on Little Sweet Potato, Grandpa had seen them.
Then her literary works on BO3, her web browsing history!!!
“Sit down and tell me slowly, don’t rush,” Chi Zhiqing called the waiter and ordered a hot chocolate. From their conversation, he guessed, “Did he find out something you didn’t want discovered? Tell me, I’ll help you figure it out.”
“I can’t say that.”
Song Tianyang’s expression shifted, her eyes darted guiltily, her hand covered her mouth as it slid down.
Faced with Her Majesty’s wariness, Chi Zhiqing was not worried, but pleased.
Her Majesty was too pure-hearted. It’s a good thing to be cautious of others.
“Sigh, forget it, who doesn’t have a few private hobbies,” Song Tianyang gave up, “My grandpa found out about me and you, thinks you’re my boyfriend. He’s afraid I’ll be swept off my feet by you, so he’s sending two young, clean-cut men to be my secretaries. Probably just hiring a couple of male models.”
Chi Zhiqing didn’t think so.
Even if they were meant to help his granddaughter get over her attraction to men, they couldn’t be low-tier. Anyone who’d worked in nightclubs would be disqualified at once.
Song Tianyang muttered, “They’re definitely Grandpa’s spies by my side. Hmph, I won’t fall for it. Even if they stripped naked and lay in my bed, I’d just cover them with a blanket.”
Historically, Emperor Yang Guang of Sui pretended to be uninterested in music and women in front of his parents, earning their favor and seizing the crown prince’s position from his brother.
Today, she would emulate Emperor Yang Guang and say no to temptation!
“That’s quite likely, so Your Majesty should be careful. But using them to relieve some physiological needs would probably earn you points with Chairman He,” Chi Zhiqing analyzed. “No one can completely suppress their needs—that’s unrealistic… Your Majesty, people at your father’s level don’t even need to look for prey themselves. There are always highly paid idle people around him—male and female—whose job is to play, meet attractive young people, lure them with benefits, and then deliver them to him. The whole process is so smooth it barely feels like a transaction. Even if he doesn’t look, someone will find and present them to him.”
“And in the future, the one being presented to will be you.”
“Your grandpa wants to test if you can control yourself—not to see if you can reject beauty, but to see how you handle it without making a big mistake.”
With Chi Zhiqing’s words, it was as if a bizarre door had cracked open.
Inside was a world she’d never seen before.
Song Tianyang pondered for a moment.
She imagined all the paper men she’d liked being brought before her, fawning and flattering—
“Oh no,”
Song Tianyang’s face flushed, “I can’t do the whole not-committing-mistakes-in-the-face-of-beauty thing!”
She didn’t even need to face it; just imagining it made her secretly happy!
Her eagerness for new gacha cards in otome games was just like those dog-emperors urging their ministers to hold another beauty selection!
“Your Majesty—”
Chi Zhiqing called her.
“Could you do it?” Song Tianyang challenged.
“I could,” he answered calmly.
“…?”
Song Tianyang didn’t believe it.
Even if a man’s brain could, his other brain definitely couldn’t.
And most of the time, the lower brain had priority.
“If you say so,” Song Tianyang didn’t bother to argue. After all, a loyal minister’s private morals were none of her business. “Well, whatever. I might not even like the ones Grandpa sends over.”
She was right—when it came to giving people, the most important thing was to get it right.
He Mingyi didn’t really know what kind of men his granddaughter liked.
Tianyang’s Weibo account had been thoroughly searched by the Qidian Group’s Senior Assistant, but he still couldn’t find out which male celebrities she liked from her super-topic check-in levels. If she liked less-famous fresh meat stars, they could just get one. But after another round of searching, he painfully discovered that the Young Lady maybe, possibly, or… didn’t like real-life men.
In the end, he could only deliver the investigation results to the Chairman and let the boss decide.
“The Young Lady usually likes to write literary works. Maybe you can find clues to her preferences in her novels,” the assistant suggested.
Writing novels…
In He Mingyi’s generation, he was considered quite cultured. He liked to read in his spare time and had even written love letters and romantic poems for his wife.
Unfortunately, neither his son nor grandson liked literature.
His son liked cars, his grandson loved sports.
Neither was like him.
“Tianyang is quite like me,” He Mingyi smiled contentedly.
The assistant, who had already reviewed all the collected materials, lowered his head.
He only hoped that after reading the novels, the Chairman could still smile like this.
He Mingyi’s smile froze the moment he turned to the first page of the file.
Then his frown grew deeper and deeper.
Novel: Entangled by the Sinister Snake Demon
Novel: XX Strategy Manual: It Has Two XX
Novel: Fox Demon Sister-in-law, Open the Door, It’s Me
Every page was a violent assault on his worldview.
For the first time, he regretted being so well-read—his reading speed was too fast. By the time he realized what he was reading, it was too late to turn back.
How was he supposed to find his granddaughter’s standards for a partner in this pile of words?
There were men, women, gods, demons, and even little animals!
The titles alone were already morally questionable!
“…You may leave,”
He Mingyi’s hand trembled as he took out his blood pressure medicine from the drawer, “Today’s conversation must not be mentioned to a third person, understand?”
“I understand, Chairman.”
Judging from his granddaughter’s literary preferences, she was filled with all sorts of immoral yearnings in matters of love.
He Mingyi was no longer worried about her being led around by men.
He only hoped that his granddaughter’s standards for a partner could at least be close to the physiological structure of a human being.
He Mingyi closed his eyes and quietly waited for the blood pressure medicine to take effect.
Poor grandpa 😭😭