Blaine City, castle hall.
Since Alicia had taken the job and gotten paid, she had to do her actual work no matter what.
“Just at that critical moment, Lin Daiyu’s delicate brows shot up and she said, ‘What an insolent fool!’ With a flick of her slender finger, all the fallen petals on the ground flew up at her will—whoosh—turning into countless blades aimed straight at Bajie’s face!”
That’s right—telling stories was Alicia’s new job.
Her new boss was sprawled out on the main seat in the hall, casually toying with some unknown fruit on a plate, listening with great interest to the tale of Zhu Bajie versus Lin Daiyu that the girl was spinning.
Just as Alicia was rambling… reaching the part where Zhu Bajie smashed Lin Daiyu’s clothes with his rake, knocked her to the ground, and was about to make his next move—
Thump!
The heavy oak door of the hall was shoved open from outside, letting out a dull, booming sound that abruptly cut off her lively narration.
Alicia gave a start and looked over.
A giant man over six and a half feet tall, built like an iron tower, stormed in.
His face was covered in a thick, curly beard, and his head was shaved completely bald, gleaming harshly in the fireplace light.
But since the guards at the door hadn’t stopped him and her boss hadn’t said anything, this rude intrusion must have been a common habit.
‘And you, bald uncle, that’s not cool! Didn’t you see that the young boss stationed guards at the door just so he could have some alone time with his young, pretty secretary? So clueless!’
“Your Highness!”
The man stepped forward, dropped to one knee with a thud, and placed a hand over his chest.
“Your Highness, Lord Lemeng has… already led his troops to occupy Lide’an City and seized the Elder Lord’s body and will.”
A new name appeared, but to her, every name was unfamiliar—this was only her first day on the job.
So Alicia wisely stepped aside, lowered her eyes, and stared at her own toes… couldn’t see her toes—this body’s chest was bigger than she’d imagined.
“That foolish little brother of mine… is he trying to steal my title as heir and become the head of House Maximilian himself?”
Lai En shifted in his seat and picked a different fruit from the plate.
“Lemeng, Lemeng… Keleiduosi, my General, go organize the militia training!”
“Your Highness… shall we summon the lords from the surrounding villages and towns?”
“Not yet. My foolish brother hasn’t even issued a declaration of war against me.”
“Understood. This subordinate will see to it at once!”
The bald General gave his chest a heavy pound—bang—then rose abruptly, strode out of the hall with a gust of wind, and was gone.
War was coming?
It was really coming!
Alicia felt inexplicably nervous… and a little excited?
After all, being reincarnated as a transmigrator into a chaotic era—what man didn’t dream of becoming an emperor?
Even though she wasn’t a man anymore, turbulent times created heroes!
As long as she found a chance to make her mark!
‘Er…’
Alicia couldn’t help glancing at her own slender arms and legs, comparing them to Keleiduosi’s burly frame.
Involuntarily, an image flashed through her mind: thousands of such muscular men charging at her with swords as big as doors or blood-dripping battle-axes.
With her frail body, she couldn’t even run properly in armor, let alone wield a weapon!
At that point, she’d either be cut down by a single slash or captured and turned into a *.
‘No way I want to become a *! And of course I don’t want to be cut down either!’
Why was it that when other protagonists transmigrated to another world, they exuded kingly aura left and right, and beauties and heroes flocked to bow to them, while she could barely lift a finger?
(‘Because those are mindless, satisfying wish-fulfillment stories. This isn’t one. If you’re not satisfied, go be someone else’s child!’ —The Author)
“What are you daydreaming about? Let’s go, come with me to the military camp, and we’ll find the Quartermaster while we’re at it.”
Lai En casually tossed the fruit core he’d been holding, hitting the girl right on the forehead.
‘So uncivilized! Littering!’
Speaking of the camp?
Good.
She could see what elite troops her boss had under his command.
“Wait, why are we looking for the Quartermaster?”
Alicia had a bad feeling.
Lai En wore a sly grin.
“As my Attendant, it’s only fitting that you accompany me into battle, right? Go pick out a suit of armor that fits you!”
‘?! Boss, are you trying to mess with me? What did I do to offend you on my first day?’
Lai En watched the girl’s horrified expression with satisfaction.
“Oh, and the story you told was quite interesting, but I don’t understand why a pig would use a weapon and talk.”
‘…Cultural differences, that’s all! Next time I’ll tell you about Harry Potter versus Godzilla.’
When they arrived at the military camp, the first thing Alicia did was eagerly inspect the soldiers under her boss.
Deeply influenced by games and movies, her head was full of images: heavily armored knights sealed in steel, greatswords engraved with cool patterns, dashing blond-haired blue-eyed muscle-bound pretty boys with blindingly white smiles.
And what did she see?
Alicia’s heart sank.
‘Sir, you must be fifty years old, right? Why aren’t you home enjoying your old age? Why join the army? Where’s your armor? Just a cotton coat and a leather vest? And there’s a huge bloodstain on that coat!’
‘What do you mean you got it like that… And what’s that patch in the middle of the bloodstain? Is this armor cursed with the soul of its previous owner or something?’
‘And your weapon—so advanced, it’s even an elemental weapon! I mean, it’s a pitchfork, but at least wash it clean! It stinks so bad standing in the camp. Don’t your comrades have any complaints?’
‘What do you mean they’re all like this? You all use pitchforks? Oh, no, some have hay forks? Fine…’
Yes, as far as the eye could see, they were all temporary conscripts—from white-bearded old men to naive-faced boys.
They wore ragged armor that was roughly the same color but varied wildly in style, and carried makeshift weapons like hay forks, pitchforks, and wood-splitting axes.
Morale was maintained only by the execution squad.
Their combat effectiveness was basically not worth expecting—they’d whoop along with a victory, but run and cause chaos in a defeat.
Alicia asked Lai En with a mournful face: “This won’t do, boss. Level with me—is this your army?”
Lai En frowned.
“I am at least your Sovereign. Can’t you call me Lord or Your Highness?”
‘Fine, fine, I’ll say it if I have to!’
Alicia had no choice but to back down.
“L… Lord and Master. So, is this your army?”
Lai En nodded in satisfaction.
“Yes, but these are just militiamen. My real core is my two hundred elite soldiers—all trained martial artists since childhood, with better equipment. I also have ten knights and thirty cavalry!”
‘…Those numbers are way too realistic! Where’s the grand army? Don’t all lords after transmigration raise a hundred thousand or even a million troops?’
“Then, Lord and Master, how many people can we gather this time? Can we beat your brother?”
Alicia looked like she was about to cry.
Lai En watched her expression, as if the sky was falling, and instinctively wanted to reach out and pat her head to comfort her.
But he stopped halfway, thinking better of it, and lowered his hand.
“If I issue a full mobilization order, including troops from the surrounding lords, we can scrape together about three thousand men. Lemeng’s army might be a bit larger.”
“How much larger?”
“Lemeng can probably field about five thousand.”
‘Three thousand versus five thousand? It’s over. We’re done for. No hope. Dead.’
The girl’s face turned pale.
Lai En curled his lip and frowned.
“You have no faith in your Sovereign at all! Lemeng hardly trains his militia, but mine not only participate in bandit suppression but also have three training sessions every year. We’re outnumbered, but when it comes to victory…”
He straightened his neck proudly.
“I have an eighty percent chance!”
“R… really?”
The light returned to the girl’s eyes.
There was still hope for her survival!
“By the way, earlier you said something? ‘This won’t do’?”
Lai En’s eyes gleamed as he looked Alicia up and down her small frame.
“What’s wrong with my army? Do you have any ideas? Speak up.”
‘Oh? Opportunity!’
Alicia’s eyes lit up.
She straightened her back, her expression no longer mournful, and her entire demeanor became scholarly! At that moment, she felt she resembled Zhuge Kongming, master strategist!
(Though she wasn’t even worthy of being one hair on Kongming’s leg.)
“From now on, we should try to stop overworking the farmers and let them farm in peace. We need to form a standing army!”
“My two hundred elites…”
“Those two hundred aren’t enough.”
Alicia boldly interrupted Lai En, but then reconsidered—she had to save face for her boss!
So she rephrased: “Lord and Master, based on your vast experience and brilliant insight, how many of these militiamen could two hundred elite soldiers handle?”
The displeased expression on Lai En’s face instantly gave way to confidence.
He answered without hesitation: “If used properly, a single charge can cause a rout. Once a rout occurs, two hundred men can pursue two thousand militiamen no problem. With my cavalry added, we could even chase down three thousand, I suppose.”
“Exactly!”
Alicia clapped her hands.
“Lord and Master, troops are valued for quality, not quantity; generals are valued for strategy, not brute courage!”
She had no idea how her translation cheat had rendered that line, but judging by Lai En’s silent nod, he seemed to understand.
“Makes sense!”
Lai En nodded affirmatively, then heavily patted the girl on the shoulder.
“Looks like I misjudged you. I thought you were just a vase… er… a glib entertainer, but you actually have some insight!”
‘Hey, boss, what did you just say? Vase? Glib? I didn’t hear a thing!’
“Once everything stabilizes, we’ll discuss this further! Maintaining a standing army costs a lot of money, so I’m sure you have a good plan for that, right?”
Alicia was stunned.
‘Right! Raising an army costs money. I studied computer science, not economics! What do I do? I need to quickly recall how protagonists in anime, movies, and novels managed their economies. Otherwise, my shallow knowledge will be exposed!’
“Oh, and let’s go to the armory. Your armor might be a problem—I probably can’t find one small enough.”
‘How could he still not forget about this?’