Chapter 17: The Goldfish Bowl of Restraint

The walk from her rental apartment to the grocery store was quite short, but Ke Ni still managed to dawdle for over ten minutes before arriving.

Ah, I really don’t want to face this.

Ke Ni bought steamed buns and eight-treasure porridge from a breakfast shop, enough for two people, hoping to settle things quickly and pay back the favor she owed Jing Sicun from last night all at once.

But Jing Sicun wasn’t in the grocery store.

The old men who liked to play chess had arrived early; a third of the chessboard was already covered with pieces.

A middle-aged uncle stood nearby, watching the game.

The stray cats lounged on the steps, leisurely licking their paws.

The little one that had climbed onto Jing Sicun’s head last night was now sprawled under the chess table, belly round and exposed, sleeping soundly.

Ke Ni didn’t have Jing Sicun’s contact information, so she could only go into the store and wait.

Today was the weekend.

Wang Professor, who usually explained brain teasers to Ke Ni and Lin Xirun’s group, had something come up and moved the class to tomorrow morning. She had plenty of time to wait around.

Ke Ni finished the steamed buns and eight-treasure porridge she’d brought, then scanned to pay for the beer from last night.

Standing on tiptoe, she peered out the door:

Why hasn’t the rabbit come yet?

Not even a shadow in sight.

There was a box for empty bottles at the entrance, with a few crushed cans inside.

It was easy to think of last night’s beer.

Actually, there were still a few mock exam questions on Ke Ni’s phone that Lin Xirun had copied over from Wang Professor, but she just couldn’t settle down to study.

Until last night’s matter was properly resolved, she felt like her heart was suspended, fluttering in the wind.

Her behavior last night was undoubtedly foolish.

No matter public or private, Ke Ni shouldn’t have shown weakness to Jing Sicun.

She knew she’d exposed her own flaws, and could only hope Jing Sicun wasn’t the type to strike where it hurts most.

If Lin Xirun found out, he’d probably have a meltdown, right?

Ke Ni clasped her hands behind her back and looked away, standing in front of the cashier counter, gazing at the poster-covered wall.

Last night, sitting at the entrance, Ke Ni hadn’t seen the whole picture.

It turned out there was a family photo tucked to the side of the poster.

Two elders holding a tiny baby boy, with several beaming middle-aged relatives beside them.

The little boy wore a sullen face, frowning, looking like he wanted to break free from the elders’ arms.

Clearly a spoiled brat, coddled by all the adults.

Ke Ni could almost imagine:

Back when her father and Jing Sicun’s elders met in this very grocery store, the old folks must have spoken with such pride, boasting about little Jing Sicun, the center of everyone’s attention.

Ke Ni stared at Jing Sicun’s photo and let out a wistful sigh: “I really envy your life.”

“Ah? Are you crazy?”

A loud voice suddenly rang out behind her, startling Ke Ni so much that goosebumps prickled up her arms.

She turned, clutching her phone—

She hadn’t waited for Jing Sicun, but Song Yi had shown up instead.

Jing Sicun wouldn’t tell Song Yi and the others about what happened last night, would he?

Nervously, Ke Ni asked, “When did you get here?”

Song Yi grinned, “I’ve been standing behind you for ages, just waiting for you to notice.”

Faced with this sudden situation, Ke Ni didn’t know what to say to Song Yi.

Song Yi glanced at the wall with her, “Ke Ni, who were you saying you envied just now?”

Ke Ni played dumb, “No one………………”

Song Yi suddenly understood, “You mean you envy those big celebrities on the poster, right? You scared me, I thought you were envying Jing Sicun.”

Ke Ni didn’t quite get his meaning.

Song Yi, acting like he owned the place, grabbed a loaf of bread from the shelf and scanned it to pay with his phone.

He tore open the bread, took a bite, and then slipped behind the counter, rummaging around before picking up a box and shaking it.

Ke Ni focused—

Goldfish food.

So there was a small round goldfish bowl behind the counter, filled with pebbles and water plants.

A tiny goldfish swam inside.

Song Yi scooped up some food and sprinkled it into the bowl, the goldfish wiggling its tail to swim over.

Goldfish eating fish food, Song Yi eating bread.

Even with his mouth full, Song Yi couldn’t stop talking.

He rattled off questions at Ke Ni: “Ke Ni, Old Dai and I are having lunch together at noon. If you’re free, come join us? He Zhi is nervous before the competition and needs a sparring partner, can you practice with him? Oh, are you here to buy something?”

Ke Ni had no idea which question to answer first…

Seeing her empty-handed, Song Yi quickly figured it out himself: “Came to find Jing Sicun? He’s busy this morning, said he won’t be coming. I’ll help you video call him!!”

Ke Ni quickly refused, “No need!”

But she was still a step slower than Song Yi.

Song Yi’s phone was already ringing with the chime of a video call, just waiting to be answered.

Ke Ni:

The ringtone went on for a while before someone picked up, and Jing Sicun’s voice came through to Ke Ni’s ear.

Jing Sicun said, “What is it?”

Song Yi, one hand holding bread, shoved the phone right in front of Ke Ni, not caring at all as he handed it over: “Ke Ni is waiting for you at the grocery store.”

Ke Ni hadn’t expected to catch the rabbit this way, caught off guard and staring straight at the phone screen.

Her eyes widened:

She had no idea where Jing Sicun was, or what he’d propped his phone on—

All she could see was part of Jing Sicun: the screen showed half his lips and chin, and the pattern on his T-shirt.

His hands were constantly busy in the frame, pressing down on a blister pack of pills, making a clicking sound as he popped them out.

Ke Ni and the phone camera stared at each other.

All the apologies she’d rehearsed in front of the mirror before coming had vanished; she couldn’t get a single word out.

Jing Sicun spoke first, “What’s wrong?”

Ke Ni glanced at Song Yi, who was leaning on the display case beside her, at a loss for words.

And right at that moment, Song Yi spotted the second breakfast on the counter.

Song Yi asked, “Ke Ni, you haven’t eaten breakfast yet?”

Ke Ni said, “I already ate.”

She instantly wanted to swallow her own tongue.

Song Yi asked, “Huh? These buns and eight-treasure porridge, did you buy them for Jing Sicun?”

Jing Sicun must have heard Song Yi, because his pill-popping stopped.

Ke Ni wanted to crawl into a hole.

Song Yi grumbled, “Since when did you and Jing Sicun get so close?”

Most people come up with clever excuses in a pinch, but Ke Ni just blurted out whatever: “We’re not close at all!”

For the ten-thousand-and-third time…

Just let the world end.

Jing Sicun laughed on the phone and said, “I asked Ke Ni to help buy them.”

Ke Ni was stunned for a moment.

Song Yi got all excited: “You’re not coming, so it’ll go to waste. I’ll help you eat it, okay!”

Jing Sicun said, “Ask Ke Ni.”

“Ke Ni, I’m eating it then!”

Under Song Yi’s eager, expectant gaze, Ke Ni nodded, “Go ahead.”

On Jing Sicun’s end, there were all sorts of pills, different colors and sizes.

It looked like he was sorting a daily pill organizer.

Ke Ni stared at the screen for a few seconds, watching Jing Sicun put a white tablet into the pill box.

She licked her lips and awkwardly asked, “Are you sick?”

Jing Sicun said, “No, it’s for the elderly.”

“Oh.”

Ke Ni gathered her courage: “I actually wanted to talk to you about something, but let’s discuss it next time we meet.”

Jing Sicun said, “Sure.”

Song Yi munched on his juicy meat bun: “Hey, Jing Sicun, will you be done by noon? Come eat with us, Ke Ni wants to talk to you, and you can help Ah Zhi practice.”

He Zhi was so nervous before the competition that he’d been mumbling in his sleep, and his roommate had gently persuaded him to move out.

He Zhi had been staying with Dai Fanze these days.

Dai Fanze was about to lose it from all the late-night wake-up calls, dark circles under his eyes after days of practicing three-dimensional problems with He Zhi, claiming he needed to sleep for three days straight.

Song Yi told Jing Sicun he was pulling Ke Ni in as a sparring partner too, and asked if Jing Sicun would come.

Song Yi’s hands were full with buns and bread, so his phone was still in Ke Ni’s hand.

Ke Ni, holding the phone, turned in surprise.

She wanted to ask Song Yi when she’d ever agreed to be He Zhi’s practice partner.

Jing Sicun said, “A noob like He Zhi isn’t qualified to compete with a genius like me. You guys practice with him.”

Song Yi, confused, stared wide-eyed: “Jing Sicun, are you a dog? How can you say something so heartless? I’d advise you not to close your eyes when you sleep tonight………………”

Ke Ni knew exactly what Jing Sicun was talking about…

Wasn’t that the nonsense she’d spouted last night?

Of course, Jing Sicun’s old newspaper clipping from his childhood quiz show was still on the wall.

There’s no way Jing Sicun had a bad memory.

If he wanted, he could probably recite every word of her drunken rambling.

Jing Sicun started laughing.

All Ke Ni could see on the screen was his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down as he laughed.

She took a deep breath: “Jing Sicun!”

Ke Ni was dragged by Song Yi to eat a quick meal with Dai Fanze and He Zhi, and even practiced various versions of variant Sudoku with He Zhi a few times, but

Jing Sicun never showed up.

In the days that followed, Ke Ni would sometimes sit by the grocery store entrance, or watch the store from her rental apartment’s balcony window.

Jing Sicun still didn’t appear.

When the weekend rolled around again, Song Yi dragged Ke Ni off to be He Zhi’s sparring partner once more.

She didn’t plan to go, but Song Yi called He Zhi right in front of her and said she’d be there.

He Zhi was moved to tears on the phone: “Thank you, Sister Ke Ni! You’re such a good person!”

After being thanked so much, how could she refuse?

Song Yi and Ke Ni agreed on a time to meet in front of Jing Sicun’s family grocery store.

Not only did they run into Song Yi, but also the rabbit she’d been waiting for all along—

Jing Sicun.

Jing Sicun got out of a black SUV, only to be immediately waylaid by Song Yi: “Just come with us, Ah Zhi and Old Dai are driving each other crazy, don’t you have any brotherly love left? Even Ke Ni is coming!”

Caught off guard by his sudden appearance, Ke Ni felt a little nervous.

The longer she put off apologizing, the harder it became to say, leaving Ke Ni flustered now.

Jing Sicun glanced at Ke Ni: “Let’s go.”

Song Yi continued, “Let’s take your car, no need for a taxi.”

Jing Sicun tossed the keys to Song Yi: “You drive, I’m tired, I’ll close my eyes and rest.”

There were some pet supplies stuffed under the front passenger seat, and a leash on the seat.

Ke Ni wanted to take the chance to talk to Jing Sicun about that day, so she followed him into the back seat.

It had been a week, and Ke Ni didn’t know where to start.

But Jing Sicun kept his eyes closed the whole time.

Ke Ni kept sneaking glances at him; Jing Sicun sat with his arms crossed, not moving at all.

Was he asleep?

He actually fell asleep?

They were almost at the hotel where He Zhi and the others were staying, and Jing Sicun still showed no sign of waking up.

The umpteenth time Ke Ni glanced over, she happened to meet Jing Sicun’s gaze as he turned his head.

Jing Sicun always looked at people so quietly.

A memory suddenly flashed in Ke Ni’s mind—she was afraid Jing Sicun would say something like “using your looks as a weapon” right in front of Song Yi.

Ke Ni pointed at Jing Sicun: “Speak properly.”

Jing Sicun smiled: “Weren’t you the one who said you had something to tell me?”