Chapter 17: I only have you

Consciousness was slowly rising, the body feeling every little bump along the way.

Soft fabric pressed against the face, and the moon had already climbed to its highest point.

“What is this…”

Yun Mu instinctively tried to sit up, but his hands wouldn’t move, as if trapped by something.

Every jolt of his body was met with contact against something soft.

Suddenly fully awake, the unfamiliar surroundings flashed before his eyes.

Cherry blossoms filled his vision.

He recalled the scene of the sudden kiss from before and blushed, finally understanding the situation.

“Sister Xun Yi… where are you planning to take me?”

He spoke slowly, feeling the slight tremble beneath him, followed by a fragmented explanation.

“Ah, Yun, Yun Mu, you’re awake?”

Shangguan Xun Yi evaded the question, her voice hesitant and her cheeks flushed.

The young girl’s heart was still in turmoil.

She had carried the boy for a long distance.

Besides escaping the Shangguan household as quickly as possible, what she thought about most was how to face him after he woke up.

After all, he had resisted her before.

With such a sudden attack, she worried she would be branded as frivolous in his heart, or worse, hated by him.

“I intend to… take you away from the Shangguan family?”

“Leave the Shangguan family? Sister Xun Yi… you don’t need to do that. I willingly stayed there…”

In the boy’s mind, the image of Senior Lin Xi Zhi carrying him away from back then appeared.

At the time, he was even younger and had said, “Whatever Master says, Disciple will do.”

Yet, she had ultimately lost her life.

Though he didn’t trust others’ words, nor the claim that his master had died because of him, he had to admit that so far, nearly everyone close to him had met a bad end.

So deep down, he couldn’t help but want to distance himself from others.

“Sister Xun Yi, you don’t have to do this for me. I’m well fed and have a good place to stay there. Why leave?”

He tried to struggle but found himself limp and powerless, so he continued asking.

“Why… are you so determined to take me away?”

“If I tell you, will you promise not to hate me? And don’t dislike Senior Lin Xi Zhi either…”

“Hate you? You mean Sister Qiuyue?”

Yun Mu paused, something clicking inside him.

“Don’t worry, I won’t hate her for that. Of course… I’d never hate Master.”

The girl softly responded with a

“Mm.”

Though she was jealous of their closeness, she didn’t want to belittle their place in the boy’s heart just to elevate her own.

In her mind, Shangguan Qiuyue had always been a good, kind child.

Although most troubles originated because of her, the girl found it hard to direct her hatred toward her.

At least for now.

“Actually, you were brought back by Senior Lin Xi Zhi…”

She hesitated, trailing off before explaining, “It was only… to use you as a medicine guide for me.”

The boy remained silent, sighing softly.

He had long known about these things but hadn’t realized that Shangguan Xun Yi was also aware.

Thinking back to what he had said to her a few days ago now felt somewhat pitiful.

He had deliberately spoken harsh words to make her dislike him, so she wouldn’t grieve for him after his death—hence his resoluteness.

But now it seemed he had overthought it… or had been self-indulgent.

Still, if he could do it all over again, would he say those words?

The answer was no.

“Yun Mu, don’t you feel bad inside? But I’m telling you, she really doesn’t know about it, so her kindness toward you is genuine. You absolutely can’t hate her,” the girl hurried to explain.

“Senior Lin Xi Zhi knows, but… she wanted to take you away later, didn’t she?”

“Sister Xun Yi, thank you…”

The sudden use of that title made the girl tremble.

She hadn’t heard that in a long time—not since three years ago, or even five years back.

The boy hadn’t called her that since.

It seemed like a simple word, but in truth… it marked the growing distance between them.

Just as Shangguan Qiuyue insisted Yun Mu call her “Qiuyue,” their thoughts were the same.

They both simply wanted to be closer to the boy.

She exhaled deeply, forcing herself to calm down, but the heavy tower of worries in her heart collapsed at that moment.

Tears welled up in her eyes, and through the tears, a soft “Mm” escaped her lips.

“Sister Xun Yi, please put me down. You should know what would happen if you take me away. The head of the Shangguan family will never let you off.”

“Besides… if I really leave, Sister Qiuyue will die. Sister Xun Yi, in your heart, do you really think my life is more important than hers?”

Shangguan Xun Yi faltered, her steps slowing.

She bit her lip, unsure how to answer.

To her, Shangguan Qiuyue was her little sister, her playmate.

Though a rival in some ways, she never thought of using the other’s death as an emotional victory.

But Yun Mu was also someone close to her.

In fact… this boy, with no blood relation, seemed more important in some respects.

So she selfishly told herself it was okay to leave.

Shangguan Qiuyue, Shangguan Hongzhi, Lin Yayue, and many others who loved her would surely find another way to save her.

But Yun Mu seemed to have no one—his parents were dead, his master had fallen off a cliff and vanished, the respected lady was the one whose bones he sought to replace, risking his life to save.

Even Grandfather Xie Yi was entangled in troubles.

Only she could help him.

After a long silence, the girl steadied herself and spoke.

“I don’t know. I only know that I don’t want you to die. Ever since I overheard you were going to have your bones taken three years ago, I’ve thought that way. After all, I think you’re all I have left… if you die, I really won’t have anyone close to me.”

Her steps quickened noticeably.

“So Yun Mu, I’m very sorry. I’d rather you hate me, think I’m selfish, than have you just die like that. I don’t want to go through losing someone again.”

“Sister Xun Yi… you…”

Yun Mu wanted to move but still felt powerless.

He sighed helplessly.

What he didn’t know was that the method Shangguan Xun Yi used to sedate him came from an Ancient Book she had learned from.

Originally, the Secret Technique described injecting the power of the stars into the body—in other words, wrapping the Secret Technique’s energy within the star power used to harm someone would knock them unconscious.

But since he was her heart’s treasure, would she really hurt him and then sedate him?

She couldn’t bear it.

So she took this “extreme” approach, though she wasn’t skilled at it and ended up using too much.

Plus, the boy had no cultivation at all, so he hadn’t recovered even now.

Finding she couldn’t persuade him, Yun Mu closed his mouth.

He planned to slip back once he recovered to avoid dragging innocent people into trouble again.

He didn’t want to watch more people die.

Especially those close to him.

Seeing him fall silent, Shangguan Xun Yi also sealed her lips.

She walked along the narrow mountain path, using the moonlight to see, her heart a mess.

Sigh, this little Mu…

I say I’m not worried you’ll hate me, but deep down I know that’s not true…

Why don’t you say something to deny what I said…

Why do I like such a blockhead…

I just don’t get it.

Forget it, once we leave the borders of Lixun Ancient Kingdom and get to the Academy, as long as Master is there, everything will be safe.

Then… I can slowly help him untangle his heart.

Thinking that, the girl’s pace quickened once more.

What she didn’t know was that behind her, Shangguan Hongzhi’s figure was steadily drawing closer.