Ruan Xi looked at the small lip print on Cheng Daichuan’s collar and quickly found an excuse to brush it off, telling herself she was just focusing, trying to see if her twisted ankle would hurt climbing the stairs.
Cheng Daichuan said, “You know it hurts. Why are you walking so distracted?”
Ruan Xi gave a dry laugh, “Hehe, I’m just hungry.”
She really was hungry. The wonton soup broth at the cafeteria was so authentic, the filling so delicious, with thin skins and generous fillings. She was just savoring each bite slowly.
Yet her eyes were shining brightly, and she was also eyeing the fresh shrimp potstickers on Cheng Daichuan’s plate.
Scooping up two wontons with her ceramic spoon, Ruan Xi stood there, holding the spoon absentmindedly for a while without putting the food into her mouth.
She was thinking of Chen Tang.
The first time Ruan Xi heard Chen Tang’s name was back in high school, during a dinner gathering at Ruan Xi’s home.
That day, Ruan Xi’s parents happened to be free, and Aunt Shang was just resting at home as well.
Ruan Xi’s mother had cooked beef soup and personally went upstairs to knock on the door, inviting Aunt Shang, Cheng Daichuan, and Shi Chao—who was cozied up at Cheng Daichuan’s house playing Hearthstone on his tablet—downstairs to join the meal.
Aunt Shang exclaimed, “It smells amazing!”
Shi Chao also shouted, “Smells so good!”
Ruan Xi craned her neck to look out the door—
Cheng Daichuan was walking at the back, carrying a large vase of freshly arranged flowers that Aunt Shang had just put together. He asked Ruan Xi, “Where should I put this?”
Ruan Xi pointed to the cabinet by the entrance. “It’s so beautiful. I think I can smell the osmanthus.”
Cheng Daichuan said, “There’s an osmanthus branch inside. Aunt Shang specially put it here for you.”
Ruan Xi leaned over to sniff the cluster of tiny golden flowers on the osmanthus branch and smiled sweetly. “Thank you, Aunt Shang!”
Ruan Xi’s mother’s beef soup was delicious, and her father was skilled at frying various snacks—fried small fish, shrimp balls, and lotus root sandwiches. The six of them sat around the table, lively and warm, eating well into the afternoon.
On the sideboard by the dining table was a photo of Ruan Xi from childhood, wearing a floral dress, hands behind her back, smiling shyly—so cute and well-behaved.
Aunt Shang said, “Xi Xi, this photo is really adorable. How old were you?”
Ruan Xi’s father proudly replied, “Four years old. Took her to the amusement park for her birthday and took that picture.”
The topic drifted naturally to childhood memories of the kids. Cheng Daichuan’s mother, encouraged by two bottles of beer, enthusiastically went home to fetch Cheng Daichuan’s photo album.
Shi Chao didn’t feel left out in this conversation because Aunt Shang treated him like one of her own children.
Flipping through the album, the first photo was a picture of Cheng Daichuan and Shi Chao together.
Shi Chao was dressed in an Ultraman costume, striking a cool pose that boys would like, standing next to Cheng Daichuan, who wore a somewhat expressionless look.
Below that photo was another group photo.
In this one, besides Cheng Daichuan and Shi Chao, there was a girl unfamiliar to Ruan Xi.
The girl was wearing denim overalls and had a pair of cute ox horn braids.
She smiled, standing between Cheng Daichuan and Shi Chao.
Ruan Xi asked, “Who is she?”
Shi Chao happily answered, “This is Chen Tang. Her mother is Aunt Shang’s good friend.”
Aunt Shang glanced over and said, “Tang Tang is really adorable.”
When they were young, Chen Tang, Shi Chao, and Cheng Daichuan attended the same kindergarten and were classmates.
Cheng Daichuan’s mother met Chen Tang’s mother then, and they quickly became close.
The elders got along well, so naturally the children had more opportunities to be together.
Chen Tang went to the same elementary school as Cheng Daichuan and Shi Chao, was good at soccer, and the three of them were teammates in the soccer interest class.
In middle school, Chen Tang’s family moved abroad. Shi Chao cried bitterly when she left.
Chen Tang’s grandparents stayed in the country, and occasionally Chen Tang would return home with her parents.
Ruan Xi had said at the time, “It’s nice to grow up together.”
A few days after looking through the album, on the evening Ruan Xi was hospitalized for acute appendicitis, Chen Tang returned to the country.
The day Ruan Xi was carried into the emergency room on Cheng Daichuan’s back, Chen Tang was visiting relatives with her parents.
Ruan Xi overheard Shi Chao and Chen Tang talking on the phone—
Chen Tang’s voice was fresh and flowing, laughing as she invited Shi Chao and Cheng Daichuan, “I won’t be back at school until next week, so how about we meet after school tomorrow or the day after?”
But at that time, Ruan Xi was in too much pain to care about Chen Tang’s situation.
After Ruan Xi was hospitalized, Cheng Daichuan and Shi Chao still had school, so only Ruan Xi’s mother took leave to care for her during the day.
Aunt Shang came by once.
Later, Shi Chao came too, but Cheng Daichuan was still absent.
Lying in her hospital bed, Ruan Xi angrily thought: Bastard, he’s off dating his childhood sweetheart Chen Tang!
Colleagues of Ruan Xi’s parents came by and sent a fruit basket.
Ruan Xi was in the postoperative recovery phase and barely ate anything, while Shi Chao happily devoured an entire bunch of bright green Sunshine Muscat grapes in the ward.
“Where’s Daichuan?”
Shi Chao froze as if hit by a pressure point.
After hesitating, Shi Chao whispered, “Cheng Daichuan is injured.”
“What happened?”
According to Shi Chao, the day Cheng Daichuan carried Ruan Xi down sixteen flights of stairs, he had already twisted his ankle but endured the pain without a word.
After so long, his ankle was badly swollen with bruises that turned a deep purple. Even the doctor shook his head in disbelief.
“Cheng Daichuan hasn’t been to school these days. Aunt Shang got him a leave of absence, and he’s resting at home. Sigh, looks like he won’t be playing soccer for the rest of the year.”
Ruan Xi asked in a daze, “Aunt Shang came to see me, why didn’t she tell me anything?”
“Cheng Daichuan ordered no one to tell you.”
After Shi Chao left, Ruan Xi called Cheng Daichuan.
He answered quickly, his voice lazy, “What, Shi Chao betrayed me and spilled the beans?”
Ruan Xi’s nose prickled, choking back tears. “Cheng Daichuan, why are you so silly?”
He laughed, “Don’t cry. You probably scolded me in your heart when I came to see you, huh?”
“…No.”
“Say it again.”
Ruan Xi wiped her tears and laughed, “Actually, I only scolded you once.”
Ruan Xi stayed in the hospital for a week, while Cheng Daichuan lay at home for half a month, missing those few days when Chen Tang was back.
Only Shi Chao went to see Chen Tang.
After Ruan Xi was discharged, she brought fruit, snacks, and soup her mother had made to visit Cheng Daichuan.
Shi Chao tagged along, snacking and chatting nonstop. “You guys really missed out not seeing Tang Tang. No one knows when she’ll be back again.”
Chen Tang’s next return was last winter, during the winter break after they started college.
Ruan Xi and her parents were going to visit Cheng Daichuan and Shi Chao, so she took the high-speed train alone to the small town where she had lived.
Chen Tang was there too.
Ruan Xi and Chen Tang had a meal together, but due to her awkward mood, she didn’t really enjoy it.
During the meal, Shi Chao kept talking about their childhood, and Chen Tang smiled and joined in.
They talked about Cheng Daichuan’s successful soccer shots, the summer camps they attended together, youth science trips, tree planting events, and rock climbing…
Cheng Daichuan raised an eyebrow. “You dare to mention rock climbing?”
Shi Chao laughed heartily, “Tang Tang and I were in charge of eating snacks and shouting encouragement from below. Only Chuan Bao actually went up.”
Ruan Xi felt a pang of loneliness, as if she were an outsider.
It was like when she transferred back to her hometown in senior year and couldn’t fit into the old friends’ conversations.
She understood that Shi Chao was desperately trying to find topics so Chen Tang, who hadn’t been back in a while, wouldn’t feel left out.
She also understood that only by talking about the past could Chen Tang feel involved.
But she was still lonely.
That meal was barbecue.
Ruan Xi held a warm cup of barley tea and finally heard them talk about her.
Shi Chao casually said, “Later, Xi Zi transferred here and became Chuan Bao’s neighbor. We formed a new Iron Triangle, but Xi Zi can’t play soccer, what a pity.”
Cheng Daichuan placed some grilled beef onto Ruan Xi’s plate.
Shi Chao said, “Xi Zi’s personality is great. She eats a ton, hahaha…”
Chen Tang said, “Shi Chao, no one talks as much as you do. I think Ruan Xi is very quiet.”
After she spoke, Chen Tang handed her plate to Cheng Daichuan and, like Shi Chao, playfully pouted at him, “Cheng Daishan, please, I want some beef too.”
Ruan Xi really wanted to be friendly with Chen Tang and to join in teasing Shi Chao.
But she only managed a forced smile.
The next day, Shi Chao excitedly told Ruan Xi they had arranged to go play soccer at the indoor field with Chen Tang.
Shi Chao was so enthusiastic, “Xi Zi, you should come too. After playing, we’ll go eat hot pot.”
Cheng Daichuan added, “You like tomato broth, right? That hot pot place is pretty good.”
Ruan Xi stood in a flurry of light snow and shook her head at Cheng Daichuan and Shi Chao.
She said, “I won’t go. I already made plans with other friends to see a stage play.”
Shi Chao was surprised, “Other friends? Who?”
Ruan Xi’s tone turned sour, “Besides you two, don’t I have any other friends?”
That time, they parted on bad terms… When Ruan Xi walked into the theater with Zhang Xu beside her, she was sniffling and wiping tears.
Zhang Xu wasn’t exactly moralistic about relationships but was quite perceptive.
He said, “Ruan Xi, you like Cheng Daichuan, right?”
Ruan Xi instinctively wanted to deny it.
Zhang Xu snapped his fingers, interrupting her, and continued, “Just avoid it. If you’re jealous of everything, people will dislike you.”
Ruan Xi stared at Zhang Xu in shock.
He shrugged, “Being liked by a good friend is troublesome. You have to distance yourself. Cheng Daichuan’s feelings for you are probably just friendship. I advise you to take a step back and calm down.”
Ruan Xi knew well that after Chen Tang appeared, her words and actions weren’t endearing.
She might even be a buzzkill, awkward.
She cut her trip short and took the high-speed train home the night the stage play ended.
On the train, Ruan Xi called Cheng Daichuan. “Sorry, Cheng Daichuan, my family has a gathering, so I’m heading back today.”
“Ruan Xi, is something going on at home?”
“No, just wanted to wish you a Happy New Year.”
After hanging up, Ruan Xi cried all the way on the train.
Her possessiveness toward Cheng Daichuan; jealousy of other girls; the confusion, helplessness, shame, and tangled feelings of realizing she liked him; even the secret hopes and fantasies…
She had experienced all these emotions last winter break.
But even now, she couldn’t make sense of them.
Someone had told Ruan Xi what to do when she liked a good friend. She had thought about letting go of unrealistic desires and just holding onto what she had.
But…
Suddenly, Cheng Daichuan gently touched Ruan Xi’s hand across the table.
His finger lightly brushed her fingertips, his tone so teasing it was intoxicating: “Loss of appetite like this, are you feeling unwell?”
Ruan Xi snapped back to reality and looked at the lip print on Cheng Daichuan’s collar with a complicated expression. “No…”
The server brought their individual fruit plates and set them on the table.
Just like in a dream, where he favored Chen Tang, Cheng Daichuan naturally pushed the fruit plate with more blood oranges toward Ruan Xi.