Legend has it that every man at thirty will go through a Midlife Crisis.
Legend says that if you stay single for thirty years, you’ll master Magic Power and become a Great Magister admired by all.
Legend…
This one isn’t a legend.
A thirty-three-year-old Programmer Predecessor in the same Company, in order not to be ‘optimized’ out and to support his Wife and adorable Daughter, put on women’s clothes at the age of thirty and became the Company’s golden signboard.
According to ‘her’, wearing women’s clothing really makes coding inspiration flow endlessly, boosting efficiency by more than ten percent.
‘Will I go through a Midlife Crisis too?’
Anime Shirt, jeans, a body already starting to lose shape, and a middle-aged man with a dull complexion stared blankly at the lines of Code before him, his thoughts drifting out of control.
“Work’s over.”
A fragrant breeze wafted by, and a beautiful woman with long tawny hair casually hooked an arm around his neck, some powder flaking off her face as she giggled.
“Jiang Yin, want to grab a drink tonight?”
It should have been a very ambiguous scene, but the man felt no excitement at all, only let out a helpless sigh.
“Bro, don’t go too far with your weird hobbies.”
Yes, this beautiful woman with heavy makeup was the Predecessor who, after suffering a Midlife Crisis, resolutely put on women’s clothes and now dedicates herself to pulling all the nearly-thirty male colleagues into the crossdressing army.
“What’s the big deal~”
“I think you have a lot of potential, Jiang Yin! Put on women’s clothes and debut with me as a team!”
“Let’s make it big and strong, and show the Boss the power of middle-aged men!”
‘But you hardly even count as a man anymore, do you?’
Jiang Yin complained inwardly, while recalling the recent Company gossip about this big brother seducing male colleagues. Though most of it was probably untrue, he still shuddered.
“Forget it, I have a blind date arranged by my family tonight. Bro, you get it, I’m thirty too.”
“Got it, got it.”
The man… no, woman… Predecessor immediately showed a look of understanding, letting him go without fuss and laughing as she went to pull others into drinking.
The Company where Jiang Yin worked was just a small Company. Though the Boss was an inhuman Capitalist who would ruthlessly discard employees once their value was drained, the atmosphere among colleagues was pretty good.
These post-work dinner and drinking parties were rare moments of relaxation amidst heavy overtime.
Participation was voluntary, with no strict rules.
Jiang Yin was often part of such gatherings, but today he really wasn’t in the mood.
Because…
Standing for a long time in front of a cake shop on the roadside, the man scratched his already messy hair, then shook his head with a self-mocking laugh and walked away.
Today was his thirtieth birthday.
He even stupidly thought about buying himself a Birthday Cake.
How ridiculous.
Before today, he never thought turning thirty was such a big deal. He still felt young, still loved anime and novels, still chased after Magical Girl idols.
He didn’t even look old—shaving his beard, some people would think he’d just graduated college.
But his body was getting worse, his drive fading away. Every day he’d go home and stare blankly at a library of Games, then end up turning off the computer and lying in bed watching Short Videos late into the night.
All of it told him—
You’re not young anymore.
A thirtieth birthday was like a hurdle.
A hurdle you can’t jump no matter what, but time still pushes you to crash into it, bleeding and battered, and you have to grit your teeth and stand up.
But there was no way out. He was too afraid to leap, had no chance to change. A blind date?
Haha…
Carrying two Tiger Skin Cakes, Jiang Yin returned to his cramped rented room. He placed one before a gray-white Photo on the table like an offering, tore open the other, and took small bites.
At his side were two bottles of Beer, a box of Cigarettes, and an overflowing Ashtray.
His thoughts were too messy to organize.
He didn’t speak, maybe afraid his Mother in the picture frame would hear.
As always, he turned on his computer and stared blankly.
He only took two bites of the Tiger Skin Cake. It was too sweet for him, not tasty at all. Beer and Cigarettes suited his middle-aged taste better.
Mouthful by mouthful, second by second.
A weary workhorse, he opened his Thermal Mug and took a sip of now-cold Goji Berry Water.
He habitually opened the Pink App and scrolled and scrolled, checking out increasingly poor-quality, plotless, and uninspired Comics, and looking at Teachers whose faces had become so homogenized they all looked the same.
His right hand moved mechanically, and as the thin liquid spilled onto his body, he didn’t even bother to wipe it off, deciding to shower after he woke up.
He fell asleep with a damp, sea-scented heaviness.
***
Sunlight… poured in.
It shone on the pure white eyelashes of a silver-haired girl, on her milky red skin, and on her tender little apple.
White, dried traces were clearly visible on her soft white belly. The scene was a bit risqué.
A small hand shot out and skillfully turned off the phone alarm.
She sat up with her eyes closed, mechanically swung her legs out of bed, and tried to put on slippers, but her legs were too short and she couldn’t reach after two tries.
Something felt wrong instinctively, but her brain refused to boot up.
The girl pursed her pink lips. Her slender white toes wiggled in midair, and losing her balance, she tumbled off the bed.
“Ouch, ouch, ouch…”
“What’s going on, where are my slippers?”
She blurted out a complaint, and after a while realized something was off.
She suddenly opened her eyes, revealing deep violet irises, and stared blankly at the slippers on the floor and the slim, white legs that should belong to some 1.5-meter-tall high school girl.
And the familiar white-brown mark on her belly.
Her mind went blank.
All the random thoughts from last night replayed in her head for some reason.
Legend has it that a Programmer at thirty will put on women’s clothes.
Legend says that a man single until thirty becomes a Great Magister.
So what does a Programmer single for thirty years become?
Correct!
A Magical Girl!
“Like hell!!!”
Jiang Yin shot up, barefoot, and ran to the bathroom. When she saw she was only a head taller than the sink and couldn’t even see her full reflection in the mirror—
She stepped back, and looking at the naked, pure white girl whose body still showed traces of some strange energy, she chose to—
Shower and pray.
“Please don’t let me get pregnant! If I self-pollinated, that’d be ridiculous!”
“Should I go to the pharmacy for some medicine… no, no way a pharmacy would sell that kind of medicine to a clearly underage girl, better buy it online. Yeah, online.”
“Same-day delivery, it has to be same-day.”
“Ah—aaaaah! What the hell was I doing last night?!”
“Why did I turn into a girl?!”
“Is there anything that can explain what’s going on?!”
“qb!? Qiuqiu!? Xiao Ai?”
“I’m here!”
“Get lost!! I wasn’t calling you, Xiao Ai!!”
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