Chapter 22: Only One to Hold

Xu Hui woke up, and so did Xiao Xi. With wide eyes, she reflexively reached out for her mother to hold her. Xu Hui, following the motion, picked her up and took her to wash her face and brush her teeth.

Xu’s mother saw her still holding Xiao Xi and hurriedly stopped her.

“You can’t keep holding her. You held her all night last night, that’s one thing, but holding her now? Xiao Xi’s already this big—what about your back?” She coaxed Xiao Xi, “Xiao Xi, be good. Your mom just gave birth to your little brother and isn’t feeling well. You’re getting older now; you can’t keep wanting to be held.”

Xu Hui couldn’t stand these words and interrupted her mother, “Mom, what are you and Xiao Xi talking about? She’s just a little kid. How would she understand any of this? I’m fine.”

When Xiao Xi heard the word “little brother,” she clung tightly to Xu Hui without letting go, pressing her face against her mother’s neck. It wasn’t until Xu Hui brought her to the yard’s water basin to wash her face and brush her teeth that she finally loosened her grip and got down from her mother.

Seeing Xu Hui brushing Xiao Xi’s teeth, Xu’s mother couldn’t help but grumble, “Such a little kid, why brush her teeth? They’re just going to fall out anyway. You should hurry and wash up to eat something.”

Zhao Sanjie awkwardly held the newborn and stood watching.

Last night, she had taken the just one-month-old baby out to gain sympathy, only to be scolded by Xu Hui. Now she felt painfully embarrassed. Yet since the baby was Xu Hui’s child, she didn’t even dare ask a single question, as if the child wasn’t hers at all.

If in her previous life Xu Hui still had affection for this child, after reincarnation, it seemed that all those feelings had been stripped away.

She understood the reasons behind how her son had been raised.

In her past life, after her postpartum confinement ended, when she found Xiao Xi missing, she panicked completely. For more than three years, she searched across the province and even the entire country for Xiao Xi. She stopped working and neglected her home, leaving the children in the care of her father-in-law and mother-in-law.

When she finally found Xiao Xi and returned home, her son had already been trained by her in-laws to not recognize her, only them. He even followed their orders to hit her and Xiao Xi, labeling her a bad mother and viewing Xiao Xi as a thief trying to steal his mother. He rejected them both so fiercely that she couldn’t touch him; any attempt resulted in him crying and physically attacking her.

Moreover, he often bullied Xiao Xi, hitting her, throwing things at her, and telling her to get out of the house.

When Xiao Xi was found, her condition was terrible—not just physically but mentally as well. Being the eldest boy, he naturally received the love and favor of the grandparents and his aunts, becoming like a little emperor in the Zhao family, spoiled and demanding the stars but denied even the moon.

Xu Hui put most of her energy into caring for Xiao Xi—from his clothing, food, and shelter to his education. At that time, he was over seven years old and hadn’t started school yet. Fearing he would be bullied or unable to adapt, she returned to teaching after a break of more than three years and became a math teacher at the school, though not Xiao Xi’s homeroom teacher.

Because of her presence, other teachers gave Xiao Xi special care.

It wasn’t until Xiao Xi’s situation stabilized that she finally had time to start focusing on her younger son’s education after he began kindergarten.

But by then, it was already very difficult. Not only because her younger son rejected her, but also because the grandparents constantly brainwashed him. They seemed afraid he’d be won over by her, so from an early age, they instilled ideas like “Mom doesn’t want him,” “She’s a bad mother,” and “It’s okay to hit Mom.” Although she poured almost all her energy into caring for the two siblings and gradually improved their relationship, the ideas ingrained in her son weren’t easy to erase.

In his heart, his grandparents came first, and whatever they said was law.

Thinking back on all the moments with her younger son in her previous life, Xu Hui looked at the baby Zhao Sanjie was holding.

All her affection and energy had dissipated with her past life’s passing. Perhaps, some bonds between people really require fate—and she had none with this child.

She could take him along now and start from scratch, but she no longer had the heart, the time, the energy, or the affection to repeat the past.

Zhao Sanjie, seeing Xu Hui staring at the newborn in her arms, hurried over and brought the baby closer to her. Smiling, she said, “Come look, Mama, your mom is looking at you. She must miss you too. Smile for your mom!”

Although she was speaking to the baby, her words were actually directed at Xu Hui.

She enthusiastically said to Xu Hui, “Mom brought back formula from the hospital. This morning I fed it to him. The little one’s so obedient and really knows how to eat—he cried when he drank, then fell asleep full. He just woke up, probably because he knew you were awake too!” Then, bending down with a smile, she said to Xiao Xi, “Xiao Xi’s awake too? Do you remember me? I’m your Third Aunt!”

At the word “aunt,” Xiao Xi was frightened and hid behind Xu Hui, clutching tightly to her leg, her face shy.

When Zhao Sanjie was little and the plan to sell Xiao Xi was discussed, no effort was made to hide it from her. The intention was to send her far away to free up household registration quotas, ensuring Xu Hui would never forget her.

Though young and not fully understanding all the words, Xiao Xi remembered them well—she knew that it was her grandparents and Third Aunt who wanted to sell her.

Zhao Sanjie teased her, laughing, “Your mom doesn’t want you anymore. Now that she has a little brother, she wants to sell you to get candy for him!”

“Because you’re a girl.”

“You have to be obedient and work hard, so your new mom and dad can have a brother for you. Otherwise, if they throw you up on the mountain to feed the wolves, you’ll get eaten.”

Zhao Sanjie said these words with a smile but a serious tone. She was the one who personally brought her to the family on the mountain, watched Third Aunt collect the money, and then left without looking back.

Xiao Xi ran after Third Aunt, crying, but Third Aunt forcefully pulled her away, saying, “From now on, that’s your new mom and dad. That’s your home. What do you have to do with me? Your mom doesn’t want you anymore!”

She tore herself away as if discarding a worn-out bandage.

The smile on Third Aunt’s face back then was exactly the same as Third Aunt’s smile now.

Xiao Xi’s entire small body trembled as she buried herself between her mother’s legs, clutching tightly.

Xu Hui noticed Xiao Xi’s distress and quickly lifted her up, pressing her whole face into the hollow of her neck, one large hand supporting her little bottom, the other protecting the back of her head. Turning to Zhao Sanjie, she said, “Thank you, Third Aunt, for taking care of the little one these past days.”

Seeing that Xu Hui could speak so calmly, Zhao Sanjie’s face blossomed with happiness and she quickly said, “Not hard at all. Taking care of your nephew is no trouble. You haven’t eaten yet, right? This morning, Lai Di and I started stewing an old hen. You should hurry and have some chicken soup!”

She believed that since Xu Hui was speaking to her again, she had already calmed down and might allow her parents, Zhao Zongbao, and Zhao Sanjie to come back.

They all hoped that now Xiao Xi was found and the children were safe, it could be treated as if nothing ever happened. Xu Hui and Zhao Zongbao’s marriage could continue, and they could all live as if nothing was wrong.

Xu Hui took Xiao Xi to eat in the main hall, surrounded by several Zhao sisters and Xu family sisters-in-law who watched her eat.

When Xu’s mother saw her finish, she urged, “The children have been found, so let it go. Later, after eating, go to the police station to pick up your parents-in-law. They’re old, and spending a night in the station will be hard on them. Also, your husband’s leg needs treatment quickly!” She sighed, “You really are just like your father—why can’t you keep your temper? You even called the police. If anything had happened to your husband’s leg, you’d regret it forever!”

“Your temper is exactly the same as your dad’s!”

Zhao Sanjie quickly smoothed things over, “Before, the old folks were afraid Xiao Xi would take away Keke’s household registration and make things complicated. But now, the Family Planning Office is strict. Just a few days ago, a woman in our town was eight months pregnant and was forced to abort. The old folks were worried this baby would be a girl again and wanted to free up a household registration! Old people all want grandchildren. Now that Keke is gone, the two of them just barely make a ‘female’ character.”

Zhao Wujie, worried Xu Hui might still resent Zhao Sanjie, defended her, “Old Auntie just means well but causes trouble. She already had a son, lost five pregnancies. She thinks having a son means no more girls and only then did she send Xiao Xi away.”

Xu Hui’s eldest sister-in-law quickly laughed to lighten the mood, “Now that you have a son and Xiao Xi is back, you have both a son and a daughter. Xiao Xi doesn’t need to be sent away anymore!”

It seemed everyone accepted that having a son, aborting female fetuses, and sending daughters away was normal and common.

Such things were indeed frequent around them.

Xu San’s sisters-in-law, Xu San’s Third Sister, and the others saw that the matter was settled and began discussing returning to the village. They told Xu’s mother, “Mom, now that this is done, we’ll head back soon. I didn’t go home last night, and the two kids must be anxious!”

Xu’s mother looked at her daughter’s calm expression and finally breathed a sigh of relief. “Then you go ahead first. We won’t be home, and your father won’t even know to feed the pigs.”

Even Zhao Dajie and Zhao Sijie felt there was nothing else to worry about and could leave, leaving only Zhao Sanjie and Zhao Wujie to care for the newborn and handle the temporary detention of Zhao’s parents.

Xu Hui didn’t stop them. Holding Xiao Xi in her arms, she went to the town’s tricycle station to send them off.

As a new mother just out of confinement, they didn’t want her to go. They insisted she go back to bed and rest.

Feeling guilty, Zhao Sanjie placed the newborn beside Xu Hui, then, with Zhao Wujie and her husband, took a lot of red-dyed eggs from the Zhao family and bought many pastries from the street to deliver to the town’s tricycle station to send them off.

In no time, the once lively Zhao household fell silent, leaving only Xu’s mother, Xu Hui, and the two children behind.

With no one else around, Xu Hui immediately sent Xu’s mother to watch the front shop. She then found the keys to her parents-in-law’s room hidden in their usual stash and unlocked the large cabinet in their room.