Ke Ni stopped her tears, raising her chin proudly: “It’s just that my eyes are uncomfortable.”
But Jing Sicun’s answer was even shorter than Ke Ni’s question.
Jing Sicun said: “Guess.”
If it weren’t for Jing Sicun’s mother just walking out of the bedroom;
If it weren’t for Jing Sicun’s grandmother and father both babbling painfully;
If it weren’t for Song Yi and He Zhi standing right there…
Ke Ni really wanted to assassinate Jing Sicun with the beef burger in her hand.
After days of staying up late and constant worry, Jing Sicun showed subtle signs of weariness and fatigue.
But his words weren’t very serious.
Jing Sicun laughed and teased, “I’m already tired enough coaxing Ah Zhi, do you need me to coax you too?”
Ke Ni glared fiercely with her slightly reddened eyes.
After glaring, under the gentle call of Jing Sicun’s mother, Ke Ni’s expression changed; she smiled brightly and walked back to the sofa.
He Zhi pulled out a burger from the paper bag and handed it to Jing Sicun’s mother.
Song Yi also pushed over ketchup, fries, and chicken nuggets.
Given the situation, there was no way to keep them at home for a meal.
Jing Sicun’s mother showed an apologetic expression: “Thank you all for coming specially to see old Jing. Let Sicun take you out to eat, Auntie’s treat.”
Song Yi quickly said, “We just ate burgers, so we’re not hungry. Let Jing Sicun owe us this one for now.”
He Zhi forced a smile: “Next time, we’ll find a chance to let Brother Jing treat us to a big meal.”
It wasn’t convenient for them to stay long at Jing Sicun’s house.
The three of them didn’t want to keep Jing Sicun and his mother from taking care of the patients, so after eating the burgers, they exchanged looks and prepared to leave.
Jing Sicun’s mother also pushed him out the door: “Sicun, you still have to prepare for the competition, so go with them. Your mom and Aunt Yu are enough at home.”
Jing Sicun lazily put an arm around his mother’s shoulder: “I’ll send them downstairs and come right back. My strength doesn’t need to be saved up for the competition.”
“This guy is so arrogant.”
“Just playing around and winning, huh?”
“Anyone who attends Professor Wang’s lessons four times a week is a fool, right?”
Ke Ni puffed up her cheeks.
Song Yi pounded his chest and wailed, “No humanity, no humanity at all.”
Jing Sicun was lightly hit by his mother, then rubbed his nose and saw Ke Ni and the others downstairs.
He tossed the car keys to Song Yi, telling him to drive Ke Ni home.
Song Yi patted Jing Sicun’s shoulder: “Call if anything comes up.”
Jing Sicun said: “Got it.”
Ke Ni and Jing Sicun weren’t that close; they didn’t know how to say goodbye.
Polite words felt too formal.
Suddenly, Jing Sicun leaned closer, staring into Ke Ni’s eyes, as if gently caressing her eyelids with his gaze: “It’s dry, not bad.”
Ke Ni took a breath, turned around, and got into the car without looking back.
Jing Sicun’s father’s condition was worse than expected, and seeing it firsthand made He Zhi visibly nervous.
After leaving Jing Sicun’s home, He Zhi kept asking all the way:
“Brother Song, will Uncle Jing still be able to walk?”
“Brother Song, will Uncle Jing still recognize us?”
“Brother Song, with Uncle Jing’s health like this, what will Brother Jing do?”
“Brother Song, will Brother Jing still be able to continue filming the show?”
Song Yi, who was driving, groaned, “Ah Zhi, stop it, stop it. Your Brother Song isn’t Fuxi or Jiang Ziya; I don’t have the ability to predict the future.”
He Zhi wiped her nose sadly: “Ke Ni, is Brother Jing not planning to continue filming the show with us, that’s why they didn’t want you to tell me…?”
Ke Ni’s mind was a tangled mess, but she forced herself to stay calm in front of He Zhi: “The urgent matter now is Uncle’s health. Jing Sicun must be discussing further treatment plans with the doctors. Also, the production team hasn’t announced the next filming date yet. Maybe Uncle will have recovered by then.”
He Zhi gradually calmed down: “Right!”
Ke Ni continued, “Last time at the show, I said I’d treat you to coffee but haven’t yet. I know a really good café that serves delicious brunch. Want to go with me?”
Song Yi immediately chimed in, “I want in too.”
Ke Ni smiled and set her phone to navigation, handing it to Song Yi: “Then please pick us up first on Tuesday and drive us to this address. It’s on me today.”
Ke Ni said this to soothe He Zhi’s anxiety.
Song Yi glanced gratefully at Ke Ni in the rearview mirror.
He Zhi stared at Ke Ni without blinking.
Ke Ni asked, “What’s wrong? Don’t want to go?”
He Zhi said, “I do. Even if I go back to Brother Song’s place now, I can’t focus on the project. It’s better to chat with you all.”
After a pause, He Zhi added, “Ke Ni, you and Brother Jing seemed close just now.”
Ke Ni was stunned.
Song Yi seized the opportunity to brag and lecture: “We adults are all mature and composed like this. You still have to learn, you know? Learn~”
He Zhi stuffed the tissues she had used to wipe tears and her nose into the paper bag from the burger and asked Ke Ni, “Ke Ni, should I not have cried at Brother Jing’s house just now? Would that make Brother Jing feel worse? I’ll send him a message to apologize later.”
Ke Ni said, “Don’t overthink it. He won’t blame you.”
The car drove into the old residential district; Ke Ni could already see Tuesday standing on the windowsill.
She thought:
The one who truly should apologize was herself.
Jing Sicun’s teasing earlier almost fooled Ke Ni, but after calming down, guilt and regret flooded in fiercely.
“I finally understand which doors God closed for you.”
“God made you smart, lucky, and excellent, giving you the most comfortable life.”
“Even cats like you!”
“But also made you arrogant, conceited, and self-righteous…”
God had already closed too many doors for Jing Sicun.
Like a cruel joke.
Giving him wings to fly, but binding every feather with familial ties.
Ke Ni thought: She might be just as self-righteous.
She should apologize to Jing Sicun.
It was a little past seven in the evening when Jing Sicun arrived at the grocery store.
The taxi stopped at the narrow alley entrance.
Jing Sicun scanned and paid, thanked the driver, and stood in the familiar dusk, thickening twilight, and mottled light and shadow.
The cats, the people, the tables, and chairs in front of the grocery store were bathed in the orange afterglow.
The old men had just finished a game of chess and were chatting as they dispersed amidst calls from their families to come eat.
An electric tricycle delivering drinks was parked outside the store, the familiar delivery man unloading box after box.
Five sparrows perched on the power line, chattering noisily like five versions of Song Yi arguing about something.
The neighbor’s auntie opened her window and saw Jing Sicun: “Little Jing, you’re back.”
Jing Sicun looked up and smiled, “Hello, Auntie.”
“Come home for dinner? I’ve stewed some fish.”
“No, thank you, Auntie.”
On the way to the store, Jing Sicun greeted many acquaintances nonstop.
He helped the delivery man unload several boxes of drinks and brought them inside the store.
The delivery man was very grateful and smiled happily: “Should I send the bill to your WeChat?”
Jing Sicun nodded slightly, “Okay, take care.”
The delivery man drove the tricycle away, and the grocery store front quieted down.
Jing Sicun walked to the cashier counter and sprinkled fish feed to the little goldfish in the tank.
In truth, Jing Sicun should have been home with his mother caring for his father and grandmother, but his mother was insistent that he not do so.
Jing Sicun understood what his mother meant.
She didn’t want to see him trapped by the family’s illnesses. Her eyes were always filled with tired sorrow — my child can’t go on like this.
Jing Sicun felt a bit helpless.
Old Jing and the old lady were asleep, so him stepping out for a bit was no big deal.
Even if he did nothing but go out for a walk and come back, it would ease his mother’s heart a lot.
***
In others’ eyes, Jing Sicun had countless moments of brilliance.
He won second place in a knowledge quiz show in elementary school;
Champion in a memory competition in middle school;
First prize in a national math competition in high school.
The program invited famous professors, directors, and special guests from prestigious foreign universities…
Many people favored Jing Sicun.
They even came to visit his home.
Jing Sicun was dazzling and was known by neighbors as “that kid from another family.”
But the reality?
During the holiday before middle school, Jing Sicun’s grandfather had a serious car accident, almost dying.
Fortunately, a medical school professor he met through the show was willing to help.
The professor contacted a top hospital for treatment, and Jing Sicun’s grandfather barely survived.
The follow-up medical expenses were high, and Jing Sicun’s family worried about them.
That’s why Jing Sicun signed up for that TV show in middle school.
To win the championship, to give his family hope.
Also to earn prize money to help with household expenses.
After the prize money came, Jing Sicun’s grandmother fell ill.
At that time, the foreign university professor was strongly recommending Jing Sicun study abroad.
The elderly professor had already mapped out a better path for Jing Sicun’s further education when he was in middle school.
The professor sat in Jing Sicun’s home with a translator, comforting Jing Sicun’s parents.
They said Jing Sicun’s future was promising.
And that everything would get better.
***
Jing Sicun’s father had diabetes and was diagnosed with uremia in Jing Sicun’s third year of middle school.
Later, he suffered a stroke and other sudden illnesses, losing the ability to work. His mother had to quit her job to take care of both his father and grandmother at home.
Jing Sicun decided to give up the chance to study abroad, but didn’t want his mother to fall into guilt and despair.
He entered a youth class.
He started a business with senior students he met on the show, helping design Olympiad math lesson plans.
He got into a science and engineering university, developed puzzle games with his college roommates.
Before graduating, he already earned an enviable savings amount.
Jing Sicun leaned back in his chair, staring at the wall behind the cashier counter.
The wall was plastered with drink posters, family photos, and clippings of his own photos.
There was one patch whiter than the rest, only double-sided tape marks left.
That was where a photo of a Hawaiian island used to be.
Jing Sicun had cut it out of a magazine.
Back then, his grandfather was still alive; his grandmother remembered all of his achievements, his father could still drive, and his mother had time to read books and watch movies.
The whole family sat in front of the TV, watching a program about the Hawaiian Islands.
Jing Sicun’s grandmother said, “Oh my, this place is really beautiful.”
Jing Sicun lazily leaned on a pillow with Tuesday: “Someday, I’ll take you all there.”
Grandma teased Grandpa, “Does that old fart get to come too?”
Grandpa scratched the back of his head: “Of course, of course. When my grandson makes big money, we’ll all go.”
At that time, Jing Sicun was full of pride, just like Ke Ni said, thinking the whole world was at his fingertips.
Jing Sicun reached out to touch that part of the wall.
The tape had dried and hardened; the island had become a distant, unreachable dream.
The old lady no longer remembered how to climb stairs.
As for Old Jing…
The car they bought for him, he had barely driven.
Sicun was still considering treatment plans for uremic encephalopathy, weighing risks, side effects, and whether Old Jing’s body could handle it…
The sky darkened and spread gloomily, street lamps in the narrow alley lit up one by one.
Jing Sicun leaned back in his chair, took off his baseball cap, and unconsciously fixed his gaze on a certain closed glass window opposite.
Someone shouted from the residential building across the street, “Old Sun, stop watching TV and come eat!”
It was dinner time.
Jing Sicun felt a little hungry, but he was somewhat…
too lazy to eat.
Sometimes Jing Sicun felt this tired, and the grocery store was a place he could breathe.
Jing Sicun pulled his cap over his face and closed his eyes for a moment, suddenly hearing Tuesday’s energetic and joyful bark.
He took off the cap.
Tuesday peeked half a head from the doorframe, mischievously nudging the sleeping calico cat with its snout.
Of course, Tuesday hadn’t come on its own—the leash was taut as a straight line.
Soon, the person holding Tuesday appeared—
The weather was a bit warm; Ke Ni stood at the grocery store entrance in a cool camisole dress.
The soft hem of her skirt swayed lightly with inertia.
Jing Sicun looked at Ke Ni.
Ke Ni averted her gaze, awkwardly cleared her throat with her dress shoes tapping on the doorframe: “Ahem, Tuesday saw you from upstairs and insisted on coming over.”
To prove her point, Ke Ni loosened the leash.
Tuesday shot forward like an arrow from a bow.
It dashed onto Jing Sicun, its tail waving so fast it left only a blur, carrying a hint of accusation: “Woof! Woof! Woof!”
Jing Sicun rubbed Tuesday’s head, still looking at Ke Ni.
Ke Ni’s face flushed a bit: “We passed by a little diner, and Tuesday seemed really hungry for meat.”
Jing Sicun didn’t respond, so Ke Ni ground her teeth and continued, “I bought two chicken leg and mashed potato meal sets. Since you’re here, we’ll reluctantly share with you.”
Jing Sicun stayed silent, waiting for Ke Ni to finish speaking, then suddenly started laughing.