The lights were sparse and lonely, appearing small and fragile against the boundless night. With the windows closed, the room was as cold as an ice cellar. The rampant darkness bound her slender figure like heavy, cold shackles imprisoning a captive.
The sliver of light peeking through the gap under the door extinguished. The woman had likely gone to bed. The two hadn’t communicated in a long time, and whenever they did speak, it was a sharp dispute. There wasn’t even a hint of the typical relationship between a mother and daughter.
Luo Ming knew that if she had been softer, she could have exchanged their encounter for a conversation that was at least harmonious. The woman had a fiery and straightforward temperament, but she had her quiet moments, too. It seemed she had initially intended to have a proper talk when they first met earlier.
However, the seeds of resentment were already buried deep within the soil. Trying to satisfy a sense of maternal guilt through meaningless concern was laughably hypocritical. Luo Ming didn’t want the woman to get her way.
She curled up at the corner of the bed, her long, slender legs pulled toward her chest. The quilt only reached her ankles. Her eyes were devoid of luster as she leaned her head to look out the window. In the moonless night, the darkness was so vast it seemed endless.
Her hands ached faintly. They were often submerged in freezing water during the winter for work, causing her fair skin to crack into tiny, ugly fissures. Calluses had formed over the scabs, completely shattering any sense of beauty.
Once winter passed, her tender, white flesh would grow back like green onions or white jade. But… she didn’t know if she would live to see the next warm spring.
In school, she was the “flower on a high peak” surrounded by admirers, a role model for students in the eyes of parents and teachers. She had heard so many praises and compliments — some genuine, some fake — that she almost believed that was her true self.
But her core was decayed. A broken family, hypocritical familial ties, and greedy desires. Luo Ming knew full well how pathetic and wretched she looked beneath the mask — like a rag doll tossed into a trash heap, its tattered fabric unable to hide the blackened, rotting cotton inside.
These few days were the coldest of the year. The thin quilt was nearly unable to withstand the pervasive nocturnal chill. Luo Ming could feel her body gradually growing cold. Hunger took advantage of her plight, leaving her physically and mentally exhausted. Staying alive… seemed to be getting harder and harder.
The woman’s meager salary went toward rent, and she squandered whatever remained. Luo Ming didn’t expect to get anything else from her. Survival was her own responsibility.
Even if she died, she was unwilling to bow her head and beg anyone for mercy.
‘Can that cat survive?’ she suddenly wondered. She had given up her own food to fill its stomach, but she couldn’t bring vitality back to a dying creature. Both she and the cat would likely end up perishing in some unnoticed corner.
She had thought she could huddle together with the boy for warmth and walk out of this abyss side by side, but she was about to fall behind. She was going to collapse halfway. The boy would probably go further, toward a bright and shining future, perhaps accompanied by some other beautiful girl… She felt so unwilling to let go.
She had clearly experienced such cold winter nights so many times before. She had gritted her teeth and persisted year after year. Yet, this time was exceptionally cold, almost reaching her limit. She felt as if she couldn’t hold on much longer.
Perhaps she was sick… or perhaps she just didn’t want to live that much anymore.
Her phone suddenly vibrated beside her. Luo Ming picked it up and took a look. The dim light illuminated her cheeks, and a slight spark of life returned to her eyes.
“Luo Ming, are you asleep?”
“Not yet. What’s wrong?” she typed, her icy fingers poking at the screen.
“Are you sleepy? Do you want to chat for a bit?”
Luo Ming didn’t reply. She stared blankly at the light of the screen. After a long time, a mad thought surfaced in her mind. Like a final surge of energy before death, she used the last bit of strength in her body to stand up, get out of bed, and put on her shoes and coat.
“Wait for me.”
“Hmm? Is there some emergency?”
“Yeah. It’ll take some time. I’ll let you know when I’m ready.”
She finished changing, crossed the dark living room, and left the house. Braving the life-threatening low temperatures, she stubbornly walked to the bus stop and luckily caught the last bus of the night.
‘I might as well be reckless one last time,’ she thought. She couldn’t just give up on the person she had coveted for so long and hand him over to someone else.
‘Since I can even give up on life, what else do I have to worry about?’
After getting off the bus, Luo Ming crossed through the cold, silent darkness and entered a cramped, chilly hallway. She found the boy’s door and sent him a message.
“Open the door. I’m here.”
“Huh? You’re at my house?”
Luo Ming didn’t look at any more messages. She stood at the door, a thick, persistent fog clouding her eyes. Her pretty face was filled with obsession and madness. She licked her gums with the tip of her tongue like a starving lone wolf wanting to use its fangs to devour a prey’s flesh to fill its stomach.
The door opened. Gu Yu wasn’t wearing a coat; he only wore a thin woolen sweater that exposed his fair neck and slender collarbones.
He looked at the girl in front of him in surprise and said, “Why are you here so late? Come in quickly; it’s cold outside.”
Luo Ming didn’t respond. She walked straight into the house in silence. The boy asked many concerned questions, but she answered none of them. Driven by an increasingly arrogant desire, she grabbed the boy’s hand and led him into his room.
“Luo Ming? What’s wrong? Why aren’t you saying anything?”
The boy was still asking questions by her ear. She found it strangely irritating. She covered his mouth and pushed him onto the bed, admiring his panicked expression. He didn’t push her away.
Luo Ming remained silent. She liked this kind of quiet. Her cold palms stroked Gu Yu’s cheeks and neck. Whether out of panic or his feelings for her, the boy allowed these bold movements to continue.
She kissed him. Her soft lips pressed firmly against the boy’s mouth. The sweet taste felt like paradise, better than the most fragrant wine in the world. It made her crave it even more, wanting to snatch every bit of it away.
Luo Ming took off her coat. Her hands slid under Gu Yu’s clothes, moving wantonly. Their bodies touched through the thin layers of fabric. The softness of her chest pressed against the boy’s. She grew increasingly out of control, intending to devour him with the courage of someone who had already burned their bridges.
“Luo Ming? You…”
The boy was calmer than expected. He stared at her face, which was filled with madness. His confusion and panic gradually faded, replaced by a tenderness that reached his very core.
Gu Yu had been flustered and confused at first, unable to think much. He simply wanted to stop Luo Ming subconsciously. Since he couldn’t be rough, he used the gentlest method possible.
Her desire sank deeper and deeper. Her hands touched every sensitive part of his body without reservation. The girl’s sweet scent was alluring yet dangerous. Amidst his alarm, he tried to organize the words that would make Luo Ming stop.
Suddenly, Gu Yu gathered the courage to proactively embrace the delicate body pressing down on him. Pressing his cheek against hers, he said softly, “Luo Ming, what happened? Did something go wrong? Can you calm down for a bit? I’ll help you find a way.”
The warm embrace was tight, hindering Luo Ming’s movements and making it difficult for her to continue.
She gradually stopped. The gentle voice in her ear helped her regain a bit of rationality. She collapsed as if all her strength had left her, slumped over the boy’s chest. Her voice was incredibly weak. “Gu Yu… It’s so cold.”
“I bought a new quilt. It’s very warm. Let’s sleep together.”
He had never seen the girl like this before. She exuded the decisiveness of someone facing death.
Gu Yu didn’t ask further questions, trying his best to settle Luo Ming down first. Having stopped, she became immensely fragile and pitiable. Two droplets of water gathered at the corners of her eyes before overflowing, trailing down her cheeks and landing on Gu Yu’s chest.