“Do you like Yun Xuechang?”
In the kitchen, Hua Yan stood behind the white-haired figure busy at the stove. Ji Ling’s words from that afternoon unconsciously echoed in her mind.
‘What does she mean, I like Yun Xuechang? Why would I like her?’
One after another, whether it was Ji Ling, Rongrong, or even the others from the Xiaoyao Sword Sect, why did they all assume she liked her?
Hua Yan curled her lips and turned her head, deliberately averting her gaze.
“Then do you miss her when she isn’t around? When you find some novel treasure or encounter something interesting, is she the first person you want to share it with?”
‘Even if… even if I really am like that… it’s just because Xuechang and I are close friends! Don’t friends care about each other?’
‘Even back in the Hundred Flowers Valley, whenever I got something new or interesting, I would show it to the people around me! I—I’m just alone here in the Xiaoyao Sword Sect with few acquaintances besides Yun Xuechang! It’s not about liking or not liking!’
“Yan’er? Yan’er?”
A pair of pale hands waved in front of her eyes.
“Ah? What?”
Hua Yan snapped back to reality, meeting Yun Xuechang’s clear yet distant red eyes.
“Yan’er, were you thinking about something just now?”
“No! Nothing! I definitely wasn’t thinking about you!”
Hua Yan immediately denied it loudly, her face flushing red.
“Oh…”
Yun Xuechang nodded as if she half-understood, then held up a sugar jar. “Yan’er, is one spoonful of sugar enough for this tomato and scrambled eggs?”
In her other hand was a large soup spoon.
“One teaspoon is enough! Who are you trying to choke to death with that much!”
Hua Yan couldn’t help but complain, reaching out to take the sugar jar. “I’ll do it.”
Her fingertips inadvertently brushed against Yun Xuechang’s hand.
“Eek!”
Hua Yan instantly pulled her hand back and turned around. “I mean… I’ll get the teaspoon for you. You can add it yourself.”
“Oh, alright.”
Yun Xuechang nodded submissively, took the teaspoon handed to her from behind, and turned back to heat the oil in the pan to start cooking.
In a place where she couldn’t be seen, Hua Yan bit her lower lip, her cheeks a deep shade of crimson.
Speaking of which… she and Yun Xuechang had indeed been getting too close lately.
In short, the reason people misunderstood and why she was so entangled with her was simply because the distance between them was too short, right?
Then she just needed to keep her distance.
Before truly figuring out her own heart, the young woman who had never experienced matters of the heart decided to take a step back—she chose to let her restless heart calm down and properly examine her true emotions.
…
At night, the warm yellow light of a candle filled the bedroom.
“Yan’er, should I put out the light?”
Yun Xuechang sat on one side of the bed and asked softly.
Originally, she wasn’t used to sleeping.
At night, she mostly meditated and cultivated—though her cultivation technique could run on its own while she slept, it was never as effective as dedicated meditation.
But lately, she had gradually become accustomed to sleeping in a bed.
At first, it was to accompany Rongrong.
And now—
She tilted her head to look at the charming red-haired girl beside her.
Now, she had long since grown used to having her nearby, used to the rich but not cloying fragrance of flowers on her body, and used to chatting with her before sleep—about Rongrong, about these mountains, and about the trivia of daily life.
Since the first night, she had also grown used to waiting for the other to fall asleep, waiting for that warm and soft body to unconsciously lean against her and hug her before she quietly drifted off to sleep.
Somehow, sleeping like this always brought her joy and peace.
In the past few days, the gap they left between them while sleeping had grown smaller and smaller.
Perhaps before long, she would be able to sleep right next to Yan’er.
Thinking of this, Yun Xuechang’s eyes curved slightly.
“Sleep by yourself tonight. I’m going to the side room.”
Seeing Yun Xuechang sit on the bed, Hua Yan, who had been leaning on the other side reading a picture book, tucked the book away and stood up.
“I—I’m still not comfortable with Rongrong sleeping alone. I’ll accompany her for a few days.”
She spoke as she walked toward the door.
After a few steps, as if realizing the excuse was a bit weak, she added in a low voice, “It’s snowing today, and she just started her first Guishui… I’m afraid she’ll kick off the covers and catch a cold. I’ll just look after her for a few days.”
As soon as she finished speaking, the red silhouette vanished out the door.
The words Yun Xuechang hadn’t yet spoken got stuck in her throat, and she could only stare blankly at the gently closed door.
‘You seem to have… made her unhappy again.’
The white-haired girl lay back under the covers, her fingers clutching the edge of the blanket as she looked down in thought.
Since bringing Rongrong back from Danxia Peak, she had faintly sensed that Hua Yan was deliberately keeping her distance.
That past intimacy seemed to have faded significantly.
‘Was it something I did wrong again?’
‘Or is this what Rongrong called being “tsundere”?’
She couldn’t figure it out, so she silently closed her eyes, extinguished the light with her Spiritual Power, and buried her face in the pillow Hua Yan usually used.
The other’s body heat still lingered there, along with her familiar floral scent.
She just lay there quietly, letting that bit of bitterness in her heart spread silently.
…
And where was Hua Yan at this moment?
She first sat quietly in the courtyard for a while until she used her Divine Sense to confirm that the little one in the side room was fast asleep.
Then, she crept into that bedroom.
Moonlight spilled through the window frame, illuminating the pink-haired girl sleeping with her back to her, her breathing steady and even.
Hua Yan sat down gently by her bed and took two items from her robe, staring at them quietly by the bright moonlight.
They were a pair of Pearl Tassel Earrings and a small Wood Carved Pendant of a young girl with a bright smile.
‘Will that blockhead think she did something wrong again and come to apologize tomorrow after I distanced myself so suddenly?’
Hua Yan looked down at the two items in her palm, the emotions in her eyes difficult to discern.
‘But I… I really need to think things through, to think about my relationship with her.’
‘If… if I really have fallen for her, what will become of our relationship?’
She moved her gaze from the objects in her hand to the small figure on the bed.
‘It seems… my relationship with Xuechang became inseparable the moment Rongrong appeared.’
For some reason, her mind suddenly became clear.
‘So what if I like her? What if I don’t? I am her daughter’s mother, and she is my daughter’s mother. From the moment we began protecting Rongrong’s secret together, our fates were already tightly linked.’
‘If we are mutual in our feelings, we can become Dao Companions and accompany each other for life.’
‘If there is no such intent, then after Rongrong grows up, we will each return to our places—I’ll go back to my Hundred Flowers Valley, and she will stay in her Xiaoyao Sword Sect. We’ll visit occasionally and treat each other with respect.’
‘But… to not see her all the time anymore?’
That meant no longer cooking together, no longer cultivating together, no longer sharing a bed, and no longer standing side by side to watch the four seasons of the world, the rising clouds, the blowing wind, and the passage of time.
At the thought of such an ending, Hua Yan’s heart suddenly throbbed with pain.
‘Maybe… I really have unknowingly fallen for that blockhead.’
She liked her earnestness and bluntness, even when she was so blunt she seemed dazed.
She liked her gentleness, the way she was always soft-spoken no matter what.
She liked her inspiring righteousness, the way she was crisp and decisive when slaying evil, completely different from the hypocritical Righteous Path she had imagined.
She liked her smile, which was light and shallow like melting ice and snow.
She liked the scent on her body, crisp and cool like the first impression she gave, yet a scent that brought more and more peace the longer one smelled it.
She liked the way she would proactively come to reconcile after a disagreement, the care she took in secretly preparing a birthday surprise, and that single strand of hair that would unconsciously twitch whenever she ate Tanghulu…
Ah, it turned out… there were so many things she liked about Yun Xuechang.
It turned out… she really did like Yun Xuechang.
Hua Yan buried her burning cheeks into her arms resting on the edge of the bed, her ears turning so red they felt like they were about to catch fire.
Then… how could she…
Make her like her too?