Chapter 12: When you need me, forgive me, accept me

On Friday morning, the sky was leaden gray.

Before leaving the house, Lin Mo had a sudden impulse and checked the weather forecast.

It would be cloudy in the morning, with rain expected in the afternoon.

After a moment of hesitation, he stuffed an umbrella into his backpack.

When he arrived at the classroom, Su Ran was already in her seat.

She was wearing a light blue knit sweater today, which made her skin look even paler.

Seeing Lin Mo enter, she looked up briefly before quickly lowering her head again.

Lin Mo noticed an umbrella hanging next to her bag.

It was a long-handled, black umbrella, very plain.

‘It was just an ordinary umbrella, yet it seemed to suit her temperament perfectly.’

During morning self-study, wisps of rain indeed began to flutter outside the window.

It was very fine, like mist, almost invisible to the naked eye.

By the second period, the rain had grown significantly heavier, tapping against the glass panes with a dense, rhythmic sound.

During the break, Chen Yu looked out the window and wailed, “We’re doomed. It doesn’t look like this rain is going to stop. Did you bring an umbrella for Brother Yu?”

Lin Mo gave a faint hum of affirmation.

Chen Yu instantly crouched by his desk, looking up with the innocent gaze of a puppy. “Brother, you are my real brother. Save me after school!”

Lin Mo shot him a sidelong glance. “How would it look for two men to share one umbrella?”

“Truly my brother.”

Chen Yu did not continue to plead. He spun around, stood up, and walked away with a flourish.

Lin Mo looked at Su Ran.

She was looking down at her book, but the pen in her hand had not moved for ten minutes.

She was listening.

—

The rain stopped temporarily at noon, but the sky remained gloomy.

In the cafeteria, Chen Yu squeezed in next to Lin Mo with his tray. “I’ll give you one more chance. If it’s raining again when school lets out, give me a lift for a bit.”

“We don’t go the same way,” Lin Mo said without looking up.

Chen Yu frowned at the table. “Open your eyes and look closely. It’s not raining right now. I’m giving you a chance to redeem our brotherhood. Give me a sweet ‘yes’ and I’ll forgive you.”

Lin Mo was about to tell him to get lost when he suddenly remembered something. He turned his gaze toward the diagonal front.

Su Ran was sitting alone at a window seat, the food on her tray almost untouched.

She was staring out the window, her profile looking somewhat lonely.

Chen Yu followed Lin Mo’s gaze. Seeing that he was still looking at Su Ran, he stopped trying to persuade him. Instead, he took the opportunity to whisper a reminder, “Is there anything more important than saving your brother? Do you have the heart to watch me get soaked like a drowned rat?”

Lin Mo ignored the idiot. He finished his meal quickly, stood up, and headed toward the tray return area.

As he passed Su Ran’s table, he spoke in a volume only she could hear. “Shall we walk together after school?”

Su Ran looked up sharply, her eyes widening.

“I… have an umbrella,” she said softly, quickly lowering her head.

“I know. So, shall we walk together?”

Su Ran hurriedly took a mouthful of rice and gave a soft hum of agreement.

Lin Mo smiled and walked away with his tray.

Chen Yu caught up to him. “What did you say to Su Ran?”

Lin Mo lied without batting an eye. “Asked her about a math problem.”

Chen Yu curled his lip. “Who are you trying to fool? Can a math problem make you smile like that? Do you know how suspicious you looked just now?”

“You saw wrong.”

“I’m not blind! Lin Mo, are you really — “

“Really what?”

Chen Yu hesitated, finally shaking his head with a sigh. “Forget it. As long as you’re happy. But I bet it won’t be easy; she’s no ordinary girl.”

“I know. That’s why I have to be even more careful.”

Chen Yu didn’t understand the double meaning behind Lin Mo’s words, but he didn’t press further.

—

The afternoon rain started and stopped fitfully.

The last period was self-study. The sound of rain outside grew denser, like countless fine needles striking the glass.

The sky was as dark as evening. The lights were on in the classroom, and the glow of the fluorescent lamps reflected on the wet windowpanes, blurring into a hazy halo.

Lin Mo finished the last physics problem and checked the time. There were two minutes left until school ended.

He packed his bag quietly, but Su Ran still noticed.

She turned her head, and their eyes met.

Lin Mo nodded to her and mouthed the words, ‘Wait for me.’

Su Ran nodded gently.

When the bell rang, the rain suddenly intensified, accompanied by a low rumble of muffled thunder.

Students crowded into the hallway. Some opened their umbrellas and rushed into the rain, some waited for their parents to pick them up, and others simply held their backpacks over their heads and sprinted.

Chen Yu, as expected, had no umbrella. He looked at Lin Mo pitifully. “You’re really not going to see me off?”

“Really not.”

Before Chen Yu could renounce their friendship, Lin Mo pulled an umbrella from his bag. “But I can lend you this.”

Chen Yu was stunned. “Then what about you?”

Lin Mo shook his head. “You go ahead.”

Chen Yu took the umbrella, his expression becoming complicated. “Are you waiting for Su Ran?”

Lin Mo shrugged and didn’t deny it.

Chen Yu hesitated again but said nothing more.

He opened the umbrella, stepped into the rain, and soon vanished into the crowd.

Rain on a school campus always brings many stories, especially in the stage of high school where everyone is desperately brave yet terrified to death. The act of shamelessly sharing a girl’s umbrella was contagious.

Those with umbrellas and those without, classmates and strangers, all seemed to be paired up by the heavens as they walked out together in pairs.

The crowd in the hallway gradually thinned.

Lin Mo leaned against the wall, watching the curtain of rain.

Torrential raindrops hit the playground, splashing upward. The scent of earth and green grass wafted through the air.

Five minutes later, Su Ran came out.

She carried her backpack and held that long-handled black umbrella.

Seeing Lin Mo, she hurriedly took two quick steps toward him.

“It’s okay, no rush,” Lin Mo said, interrupting the words she was about to blur out.

Su Ran pursed her lips, swallowing the apology at the tip of her tongue.

Just as she opened her umbrella, she saw a large hand reach over.

“Let me,” Lin Mo said, reaching out.

Su Ran looked up at him slightly, hesitated for a moment, and then handed the umbrella to him.

Actually, she had wanted to insist on holding it herself, but her experience from last time told her that even if the height of the umbrella was just a few centimeters higher than usual, her arm would quickly grow sore.

Lin Mo took the umbrella, and the first thing he did was tilt it toward her side.

Su Ran noticed immediately. “You’re getting rained on.”

“It’s okay,” Lin Mo said, echoing her line from last time.

“It is not okay,” Su Ran replied, also mimicking his previous words. “You’ll catch a cold.”

Lin Mo smiled. “Didn’t you get wet last time, too?”

Su Ran’s brow furrowed slightly, looking stubbornly determined to say something.

But Lin Mo spoke first. “Last time you got wet, so this time it’s my turn. It’s only fair.”

Su Ran’s frown deepened, her cheeks puffing out slightly as she fell silent.

She lowered her head to look at the ground. The rainwater gathered into small streams at their feet, flowing past her white canvas shoes.

The two walked in silence.

The rain was loud, but under the umbrella was a quiet little world.

Lin Mo could smell a faint fragrance on Su Ran.

It wasn’t perfume, but the scent of laundry detergent mixed with piano rosin.

It was very clean, very Su Ran.

When they reached the first intersection, they hit a red light.

They stopped in unison. Rainwater flowed down the ribs of the umbrella in thin strands.

Lin Mo childishly spun the umbrella handle, sending those strands of water flying outward. Unluckily, he splashed a passing elementary student and was called an idiot.

Before Lin Mo could react, he saw the student suddenly shrink his neck and flee in a panic.

Turning to look, he saw Su Ran had already lowered her head to hide her expression.

“You lent your umbrella to Chen Yu?” she suddenly asked, seemingly trying to shift her attention.

Lin Mo smiled, unbothered. “That’s why I’m using yours.”

Su Ran’s eyelashes fluttered.

She didn’t speak, but Lin Mo saw the corners of her mouth turn up slightly.

As the light turned green and they were about to cross the street, a small car suddenly sped past, kicking up a massive spray of water from the roadside.

Lin Mo acted quickly, pulling Su Ran toward him.

The spray just barely missed her skirt.

Su Ran’s pupils contracted. She felt as if the arm he grabbed had instantly lost all sensation, melting away.

“Th—thank you.” She suspected she had gone mute, as she could only hear the sound of her racing heart.

“Don’t mention it.” Lin Mo let go of her arm.

Su Ran didn’t move away.

She stood frozen in place, a bit dazed, her arm brushing against his.

Through the fabric of their school uniforms, Lin Mo could feel her skin.

Smooth, cool, and possessed of a young girl’s unique softness.

—

It wasn’t until they reached the second intersection that Su Ran snapped out of it, suddenly coming to a dead stop.

Lin Mo’s foot, which had just stepped out, hovered in mid-air before he pulled it back.

“What’s wrong?” he asked softly.

“Your house… doesn’t your house go to the right?” she asked in a small voice.

Lin Mo only then realized they had already passed the point where they should have separated.

He couldn’t be blamed for not watching the road; she hadn’t been watching either. She had kept her head down the whole time, like a little quail basking in his peripheral vision.

“The rain is still heavy. I’ll walk you to the station.”

Lin Mo found a god-given excuse, while his eyes continued to drift toward the right.

“It’s not necessary. It’s very close now.”

Su Ran’s ears remained red, as if she were under immense pressure. “You—you should go back. Don’t go out of your way…”

“I already have.”

Su Ran fell silent.

She pursed her lips and continued forward, her steps noticeably lighter.

The bus stop was not far away.

Through the curtain of rain, many people were already huddled under the station’s roof.

They stopped at the edge of the platform.

The rain showed no sign of letting up; instead, it grew even heavier.

Violent winds swept the rain sideways, and the station roof could only cover half of those waiting.

Standing at the edge of the roof, Su Ran’s shoulder was still getting damp from the wind-blown rain.

Lin Mo tilted the umbrella further toward her, leaving his own back completely exposed to the downpour.

The autumn rain was freezing, but he didn’t care.

The rain he had died in during his past life was much heavier than this, and it had been mixed with blood.

By comparison, this rain was truly a blessing from heaven.

After an unknown amount of time, the bus slowly pulled into the station.

Before boarding, Su Ran turned back to look at Lin Mo, her gaze complicated.

“You…” She hesitated.

Lin Mo smiled and waved his hand. “Get on. See you Monday.”

Su Ran bit her lip. Suddenly, she pulled something out of her backpack and shoved it into Lin Mo’s hand.

It was a small plastic bag containing something.

Before Lin Mo could see it clearly, the doors closed, and the bus drove into the curtain of rain.

Lin Mo stood there with the umbrella, watching the taillights disappear around the corner.

After a long while, he opened the plastic bag. Inside was a clean white towel, folded neatly, along with a note:

‘Dry off, don’t catch a cold.’

‘You don’t have to return this one. It’s a gift.’

Lin Mo looked at the note, feeling both happy and a bit annoyed with himself.

The reason he had hesitated when bringing the umbrella this morning was that he wanted to share hers, but worried she might not have one. Yet, she had not only brought an umbrella but also a towel.

He was never as thoughtful as she was.

Lin Mo took the towel out and wiped his face.

The towel was very soft, like her arm.

It was very fragrant; it smelled like her.

The rain was still falling, but the world under the umbrella had become very dry.

Lin Mo walked toward home. Passing a convenience store, he went in to buy a hot drink.

As he paid, the clerk smiled and asked, “Student, did you get caught in the rain? It’s really coming down.”

“It is, but I didn’t get wet. I have an umbrella.”

Lin Mo held up the umbrella as if to show it off.

The woman seemed to notice something and said with a beaming smile, “That’s a nice umbrella. Is it your girlfriend’s?”

It was actually just an ordinary black umbrella; it really couldn’t be called nice or ugly.

Lin Mo’s expression faltered slightly, and his desire to show off faded.

He shook his head. “A classmate’s.”

The woman’s smile became meaningful. “A classmate, I see. Classmates are good. Classmates are the most innocent.”

Lin Mo didn’t respond, taking his hot drink and leaving.

At some point, the rain slowed down.

He sipped his hot drink as he walked out of the store, suddenly remembering a detail from his past life.

On that rainy night that ended his life, as he lay in a pool of blood, the first thing Su Ran had done when she rushed over was take off her coat and cover him with it.

It was a long black trench coat, almost reaching the ground.

She had draped it over him, trying to block the rain, trying to cover his wounds.

She had been crying then, crying like a madwoman, her tears mixing with the rain and dripping onto his face. She cursed at him while saying, “I’ve guarded you for ten years…”

Thinking back now, perhaps during those ten years in his past life, she had also been waiting for a chance.

Just like he was now—waiting for her to need him, waiting for her to forgive him, waiting for her to accept him.

Lin Mo stopped, moved the umbrella aside, and looked up at the sky.

The cold rain fell on his face, chilling him to the core.

‘In this life, we will both be okay.’