Realizing her head was on his shoulder, she unconsciously tightened her hold on the sutra. The next moment, Liang Xu took it from her arms.
This was his way of letting her rest without worry.
Lin Xiyue didn’t dare move, her heart pounding fiercely.
She blinked nervously, unsure how to handle the unbidden flutter stirring deep within her.
Amid the clatter of the carriage wheels, she finally succumbed to exhaustion, drifting off amidst fluster and shyness.
It seemed she only slept briefly before he woke her—by then the carriage had arrived at the General’s mansion.
Liang Xu returned the sutra to her and helped her down.
After formal introductions, Lin Xiyue presented the sutra she had copied by hand. Lady Liang praised the calligraphy and sent gifts for her—a pearl hairpiece, two bolts of brocade, and some rouge and powder.
Lady Liang’s attitude was not overly warm, but as the wife of a noble general, to recognize Lin Xiyue as a goddaughter was a great favor. Lin Xiyue dared not hope for more.
After lunch at the mansion, Liang Xu sent her home.
Afterwards, his visits to the Lin household became less frequent—sometimes every seven or eight days, sometimes once every ten or fifteen.
Lin Xiyue didn’t dare visit the General’s mansion casually either, only sending a festival gift on the solar term day to express her gratitude, avoiding any other uninvited calls.
Life passed peacefully for three months until Lin Xiyue noticed she had not had her period for three months, even though she had not gained weight—in fact, her waist seemed thicker.
After marrying Qin Bei, the constant fear and stress had affected her health, causing irregular periods.
But this time, after three months with no sign, she grew increasingly worried.
Her mother also noticed and suggested she see a doctor for some medicine to regulate her cycle.
Lin Xiyue did visit the doctor and brought back medicine but delayed taking it.
She didn’t know whether she should take the medicine and was afraid to tell her mother the truth. Afraid to confide in anyone, she sought help from the Buddha.
She went to Daxiang Temple to burn incense and pray, hoping for a sign, but before praying she unexpectedly ran into Liang Xu.
“Brother, are you here to pray as well?”
“No, I’m here to meet someone.”
Lin Xiyue was momentarily stunned but suppressed her swirling emotions and smiled. “Oh, then I won’t disturb you.”
“Mm, I’ll be quick. Wait for me here after I finish, and I’ll see you back.”
“No need, brother…” Today, there was no need to pray. She had already made up her mind.
But he thought she was just being polite, said “Wait for me,” and hurried toward the back of the hall.
Lin Xiyue hesitated, unsure whether to leave or stay. After some wavering, she chose a quiet corner near the temple entrance to wait.
Many visitors came to worship and burn incense that day. Bored, she watched the young women passing by and wondered which one he was meeting.
Looking up, she saw scattered clouds melting into the pale orange dawn as the light spilled through the gaps, shining upon all beings.
She was just one insignificant soul among them.
When the meeting was over, Liang Xu walked out from behind the hall and immediately spotted Lin Xiyue in the corner.
Today she wore a distant mountain-purple vest and mist-white skirt. A veil covered her head, the thin silk hanging down like a wisp of mist.
The wind stirred the silk and skirts as if they might drift away on the breeze.
He stepped closer and saw she was tilting her face slightly upward, the veil parted slightly as if lost in thought, a trace of sorrow on her expression.
“What are you thinking about?” he asked.
Perhaps startled by his sudden voice, she trembled, glanced at him quickly, then lowered her head again, letting the veil cover her. “Did your meeting go well, brother?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“She didn’t like me.”
So that meant he liked the girl, but she didn’t like him.
“Why didn’t she like you?”
Liang Xu didn’t want to admit the truth—that he simply wasn’t interested in the girl.
The girl had been chosen by his mother based on Shen Youran’s character. Indeed, the girl reminded him of Shen Youran—innocent and lively, with a candid nature—but for some reason, he felt no stirring in his heart.
Knowing the match had failed again, he gave a self-deprecating reason when Lin Xiyue asked: “I’m not good with words, nor entertaining…”
“I think you’re great,” Lin Xiyue comforted him. “Your destined match hasn’t arrived yet. You’ll definitely meet the right girl someday.”
“Mm, let’s go.”
Today there was no temple fair. The fortune-teller’s stall outside the temple was deserted as they passed.
The fortune-teller called after them: “Sir, wait! I see darkness on your forehead, dull eyebrows and withered brow bones—not a good sign. There may be danger of losing a young son…”
They stopped. Liang Xu frowned and looked at the fortune-teller: “Sir, I am unmarried. Where would a son come from?”
The fortune-teller still cast a divination: “I did not err. Your child star is damaged, and the fetal origin meets death…”
Child star? Fetal origin?
Liang Xu stopped listening to his nonsense and turned to leave.
“Sir, I mean well. This omen is clear—you should prepare early…”
Just a charlatan, Liang Xu thought.
But that very night, in a dream wrapped in mist and clouds, he saw the little deer again.
This time, the deer no longer took the form of Shen Youran but became a child—a boy wearing a red bellyband, bare-bottomed, pouting and glaring at him with grievance.
“Daddy doesn’t want me? You really don’t want me? Then I’m leaving…”
Liang Xu woke up startled.
Such a strange dream.
In the past, whenever he had such a dream, Shen Youran would leave him in the dream, and soon after in reality, she would marry someone else.
Was this dream also a premonition?
Where did I get a son from?
He pondered carefully. He had always kept himself pure, never gone to brothels. The maids in his courtyard were honest and had never climbed into his bed.
He had met many girls, but mostly only once. Among them, besides Shen Youran, only Lin Xiyue had truly had contact with him…
Lin Xiyue… Lin Xiyue?
Suddenly remembering, the night his drugged body lost consciousness, he faintly heard a woman crying.
The next day, Lin Xiyue said the doctor had used acupuncture to break the drug’s effects, so he hadn’t thought much of it.
Could it be that Lin Xiyue…
At dawn, the city gates just opened, and Liang Xu was the first to ride out.
When he arrived at the Lin household, the family was having breakfast and greeted him.
He didn’t see Lin Xiyue at the table.
“Where’s Xiyue?” he asked.
Lin Xiyue’s mother smiled brightly, “Xiyue stayed up late finishing her copying and is still asleep.”
“I’ll go check on her…”
As he spoke, he headed to her room.
Lin’s mother was startled and tried to stop him. “Lord Liang, she’s still asleep… It’s not proper—her bedroom is off-limits to outside men, even sworn brothers.”
But Lin’s mother couldn’t hold him back. Lin’s father was slow and weak on his legs, and before he could rise, Liang Xu had already burst into the room.
Pulling back the curtains, he saw Lin Xiyue lying beneath the covers, eyes tightly closed, face pale.
“Xiyue! Xiyue!”
“Lord Liang…” Lin’s mother tried to pull him away but upon seeing her daughter’s unresponsive state, was terrified. “What’s happened? Daughter! Daughter…”
After their calls, Lin Xiyue finally opened her eyes.
“Mother,” she whispered, her gaze slowly turning toward Liang Xu, voice weak. “Brother, why are you here?”
“What’s wrong? Do you feel unwell anywhere?” Liang Xu asked.
Lin Xiyue lowered her eyes guiltily. “I’m fine. Maybe I overdid it copying books last night…”
“Tell me the truth.” He looked at her. This wasn’t just fatigue.
“I really am fine.”
Enough. He didn’t press further. “I’ll get a doctor for you.”
“No,” Lin Xiyue grabbed his hand. “Don’t call a doctor.”
“Daughter, you really should have a doctor look at you,” Lin’s mother said anxiously. “She was fine last night. Why is she like this now? Did she take some bad medicine last night?”
Liang Xu’s face darkened. “What medicine did you take?”
Lin Xiyue fell silent. Her mother anxiously answered, “Medicine to regulate her monthly cycle.”
Monthly cycle?
Liang Xu’s sharp eyes caught something. He stared into Lin Xiyue’s eyes: “Was it really medicine for your cycle? Answer me.”
Lin Xiyue wished she could bury herself in the quilt, unable to meet his gaze. “Don’t ask. I just need to rest and I’ll be fine.”
Without delay, Liang Xu turned and rode out to summon a doctor.
When the doctor arrived, nothing could be concealed.
“This young lady took a medicine to induce abortion, but the dose was insufficient. The fetus is still in her womb. Do you want to try to abort or keep the child?”
The room fell silent.
Lin’s mother stammered, “Daughter, didn’t you say that Qin Bei was cruel and inhumane? Then this child in your womb is…”
“Mine.” Liang Xu’s voice was calm but resolute. His heavy brows furrowed as he looked at the half-hidden face in the covers. “The child in my womb is mine, isn’t it?”